TDS Time Machine | Ko$ta Doin' Business

The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Comedy Central

Comedy, Daily News, News

4.4 • 13.5K Ratings

🗓️ 27 September 2025

⏱️ 25 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Celebrate Michael Kosta by making fat stacks with Kosta Doin' Business. Michael shares how to get rich during Trump's second term thanks to boomin' prison stocks, the impending climate crisis, liberals' love for yard signs, and a wise investment in Kleenex. Don't worry about trade wars, Starbucks's bathroom policy, or egg prices breaking the bank with these guaranteed money-making tips. Dive into America's mad money problems in the face of Trump's tariffs: panicked shopping on the rise, price hikes on everyday toys and goods, and the uncertainty around those precious iPhones. And don’t worry about Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill passing, because Kosta's cracking the code on how you can exploit Medicaid cuts, gambling taxes, and even Alaskan tax breaks to make some sweet dough. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Abby's just woken up. It's 731 and she's forgotten to ring the doctor. There's no point
0:05.5	ringing now. She needs to get to work, but she's not worried. She's got an HSBC Premier bank account
0:10.5	with access to digital GP appointments plus two second opinions a year should she need them.
0:15.1	Everything's premier when your bank account is. Search HSBC Premier, HSBC UK, opening up a world of opportunity.
0:22.4	The doctor will see you now.
0:24.6	Apply with £100,000 annual income or £100,000 savings or investments with HSBC UK or Premier Status abroad.
0:30.0	Ready to launch your business?
0:31.5	Get started with the commerce platform made for entrepreneurs.
0:34.7	Shopify is specially designed to help you start, run and grow your business
0:38.8	with easy customizable themes that let you build your brand,
0:42.4	marketing tools that get your products out there.
0:44.6	Integrated shipping solutions that actually save you time.
0:47.4	From startups to scaleups, online, in person and on the go.
0:51.9	Shopify is made for entrepreneurs like you.
0:54.4	Sign up for your $1 a month trial at Shopify.com slash setup.
1:00.6	You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey, hey everybody. I'm Michael Costa, and this is Costa doing business, all right?
1:22.5	Big shout out to our sponsor, cocaine. Cocaine. It's not illegal if you're white.
1:29.0	Now, now that we know who our next president is, we're tracking a whole lot of movement
1:34.0	in the market, so how can you get rich off of Trump presidency?
1:37.8	Hit me!
1:38.8	Private prison stocks rose overnight after Trump selected immigration hardliner Tom
1:43.8	Homan, as his borders are.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Comedy Central, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Comedy Central and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.