Tantrums & Perfectionism- Podcast #726
Zen Pop
Todd and Cathy Adams
4.9 • 637 Ratings
🗓️ 5 September 2023
⏱️ 57 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Todd and Cathy discuss the three different types of perfectionism and why trying to perfect actually backfires and leads to fragility. They discuss why our culture has overvalued the idea of being perfect, the importance of humanizing over humiliating, and they answer a follow-up question about highly sensitive children. For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.
Time Stamps
(00:00:00) Introduction
(00:06:15) How long do you let tantrums last for a six year old?
(00:10:06) How normal is it for a six year old to have a tantrum?
(00:11:20) Do you support a six year old’s fear without being pushy or passive?
(00:12:48) What about a six year old who has verbalized thoughts like, ‘I’m a bad daughter’
(00:18:15) Comparisons can lead to unnecessary stress and a sense of inadequacy
(00:24:30) What’s the difference between a toddler and a teenager?
(00:27:10) Upcoming episode with Devorah Heitner
(00:27:29) Where’s the line between doing things for her and letting her do them herself?
(00:28:25) Discussion about perfectionism and how it can impact individuals
(00:30:57) What’s the difference between other oriented and, socially prescribed?
(00:34:06) They emphasize the negative effects of perfectionism, such as making individuals fragile in the face of failure and preventing them from admitting mistakes
(00:39:07) Do you want to be with someone who’s such a perfectionist that you can’t let go?
(00:40:34) Importance of recognizing that success stories are not the only valid narratives
(00:45:00) Prioritizing Human Well-Being Over Economic Metrics
(00:50:00) Significance of humanizing rather than humiliating children when they make mistakes, promoting empathy and understanding
(00:52:22) Sponsor Spotlight: Jeremy Kraft – Chicagoland Remodeling Specialist
(00:52:36) Discover Team Zen: Access Exclusive Parenting Content
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Resources
Dad Holding Space for His Daughter’s Big Feelings
If You’ve Come this Far Podcast
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Here we go. My name's Todd. |
| 0:06.3 | Mrs. Kathy. |
| 0:07.0 | Welcome back to another episode of Zen Parenting Radio. |
| 0:09.4 | This is podcast number 726, while I listen to Zen Parenting Radio, because you'll feel outstanding. |
| 0:14.9 | And always remember our motto, which is that the best predictor of a child's well-being is a parent's self-understanding. |
| 0:21.7 | On today's show, I'm going to answer some questions. |
| 0:24.0 | One of my buddies, who has a six-year-old daughter, is wondering about, what is it, sweetie? |
| 0:32.3 | I have no idea. |
| 0:33.9 | Because I thought we were talking about perfectionism. |
| 0:35.6 | No, no, no, no. |
| 0:37.0 | Sensitive, highly sensitive children. |
| 0:38.7 | As we did last week. |
| 0:39.7 | I know. |
| 0:40.2 | And it's just a follow-up to it. |
| 0:41.8 | Oh, okay. |
| 0:42.5 | So there's just a few questions that I want to riff with you on. |
| 0:45.3 | And then you're going to talk about perfectionism. |
| 0:47.5 | Correct. |
| 0:48.0 | But first, we have a big announcement. |
| 0:49.7 | Hold on. |
| 0:50.0 | Let me do drummills. |
| 0:57.2 | It's such a big announcement. |
... |
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