It would take us hours and hours to hike a couple of miles because we were wearing these giant backpacks that were like 60, 70 pounds, which was like half of our body weight as teenagers.

We were also not just in Utah in the winter, we were in the Uinta Mountains.

Twice a week we had quote unquote Billy Bath Days, which was our only available form of washing.

Two tins of water about the size of this tissue box, and we had 15 minutes to stand in the literal dirt on the ground. If you were dirty enough for long enough, the dirt starts like adhering to your skin. And you can't get it off. If you were sick, they just ignored you. My friend and I both got either really bad colds or the flu or something at the exact same time, accuse you with faking it, of saying you're trying to get out of hiking by being sick, and they made us hike anyways. And then a constant was a feedback group, which was honestly a form of attack therapy. Someone would say, I'd like to call a feedback group, and everyone else had to stop what they were doing immediately and gather around the person. You know, Alexander, are you open to hearing feedback? And you couldn't say no. I technically could be like, no, I'm not, but then the person would call another group like three hours later and say, are you now open to receiving feedback? And the first person's feedback could be anything. And you had to sit there and say, okay, like, thank you for your feedback. I told us that we couldn't experience anger. That anger was a secondary emotion. Expressing anger was a sign that we had to stay in the program longer because we were less developed emotionally. But it also worked because it made us much more compliant. At my first program, I went in, I was like, my parents are abusive. I have documentation of it. And my therapist at my first program told me that I was playing the victim.

And I wouldn't be able to leave until I wrote a letter of accountability, worked with accountability for the role I played. What? And my parents treating me like this.

Mine is the only voice. What have I been doing? Lay down my autonomy.

After that, it got very dark very quickly.

Hey guys, my name is Shalise Anzola, and this is Colts to Consciousness,

or we discussed leaving high demand religions or organizations and finding healing

and independence through awareness and true individual

sovereignty. If you're only listening on those podcast platforms and you would prefer to see our faces

and support our show in the best way you possibly can, go to YouTube at close to consciousness.

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So it really helps us get more exposure for not only these groups, but for our guests who are

bravely coming on and sharing their stories. Today's guest, she recently did an unmasking.

She's been talking on her social channels for four years now

about the troubled teen industry, two different camps that she was sent to. Her parents paid for her to be

kidnapped and she didn't know what was going on. We'll get into all of the things that she had to go

through. One was a wilderness camp, another one was an academy, and how she was separated from

her family, treated horribly, and the ramifications that came with that. So thank you so much for

...