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Shrink For The Shy Guy

Surrender Is The Ultimate Life Skill (Principle 2)

Shrink For The Shy Guy

Dr. Aziz: Social Anxiety And Confidence Expert, Author and Coach

Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Careers, Business, Self-improvement, Education

4.8649 Ratings

🗓️ 23 October 2024

⏱️ 22 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I'm excited to share with you the second principle of sanity and victory—a concept that can help you feel more free from anxiety, stress, and worrying about what others think. These principles are designed to bring you a sense of peace while empowering you to create the life you want, which is the ultimate victory.

In this episode, we dive into the power of surrender. What does it mean to surrender, and how can it become the ultimate life skill for you? I'll explain the meaning behind this principle and how it helps you flow with life, free yourself from unnecessary suffering, and stay calm, even in challenging circumstances. I'll also show you how to avoid the trap of thinking you need everything to go a certain way to feel okay, and how to let go of that need for control.

If you're looking to feel less weighed down by life's demands and more empowered, this episode is for you. So, let's explore how surrender can bring you more freedom and joy, and set you up for victory.

 

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As a reminder, sanity, in this context, refers to a sense of peace and the ability to flow with life without sabotaging your well-being. Victory, on the other hand, is about breaking through challenges and becoming who you are truly meant to be. These principles are here to guide you towards both.

Principle #2: Surrender Is the Ultimate Life Skill

"Surrender to the divine flow is the ultimate life skill. Not my will, but thy will. I remember the fundamental error that I need something out there to be exactly a certain way in order to feel okay in here. Peace is available right now. I'm okay either way. All I need is within me now. I accept the current painting as it is and calmly walk into an entirely different room."

Unpacking the Principle

  1. Surrender vs. Giving Up: When we hear the word "surrender," it’s common to associate it with defeat. However, true surrender means submitting to a greater force, allowing life to unfold without forcing our will upon it. It’s about trusting the process and recognizing that we don’t always need to control every aspect of our lives.
  2. The Divine Flow: This principle encourages you to connect with the divine flow—whether that’s a spiritual belief, the universe, or simply the natural progression of life. Understanding that life is happening for you, not to you, can alleviate the burden of needing everything to go your way.
  3. Accepting Reality: One of the biggest challenges we face is the belief that we need certain outcomes to feel okay. This fundamental error leads to suffering. We often say, “If only this person liked me,” or “If only I had that job,” then I would be happy. This attachment to specific outcomes traps us in a cycle of anxiety.
  4. Finding Peace Now: The statement "peace is available right now" reminds us that we can find calm within ourselves regardless of external circumstances. By shifting our focus inward and acknowledging that our worth does not depend on external validation, we can cultivate a sense of peace.
  5. Accepting the Current Painting: Imagine your life as a gallery filled with paintings representing different aspects of your existence. Instead of fixating on the ones you dislike, accept them as they are and choose to explore other rooms in your gallery. This metaphor illustrates the importance of recognizing your current circumstances without being bogged down by them.

Applying the Principle in Your Life

Now that we’ve unpacked this principle, let’s explore how you can integrate it into your daily routine.

Time for Action: Embrace Surrender

Your action step today is to practice surrender. Here’s how you can do this:

  • Reflect on Your Attachments: Identify areas in your life where you feel anxious or stressed. Ask yourself what specific outcomes you’re attached to and how they affect your emotional state.
  • Practice Acceptance: Take a moment to sit quietly and breathe deeply. Repeat the mantra, “I am okay either way.” Feel the weight of your attachments lifting as you accept your current circumstances.
  • Engage with the Present: Each day, find a small moment to consciously surrender. This could be letting go of a minor annoyance or frustration. Notice how this shift affects your overall mood and well-being.
  • Utilize Guided Resources: Consider listening to the guided audio exercises mentioned in previous episodes. These resources can help reinforce your practice of surrender and acceptance.

As we conclude this episode, remember that surrendering to the divine flow doesn’t mean giving up on your goals. It means embracing the journey and allowing life to unfold as it should. By practicing this principle, you can cultivate a deeper sense of peace and freedom, empowering you to navigate life with grace and confidence.Join me next time as we continue our exploration of the Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory. Until then, may you have the courage to surrender and embrace the flow of life, knowing that all you need is within you now. Thank you for being here!

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome to Shrink for the Shy Guy.

0:05.0

This is the show for you if you are sick and tired of being held back by fear, self-doubt,

0:10.0

social anxiety, shyness, anything that's stopping you from you being you.

0:15.0

I'm going to share the most powerful tools and resources that I've been discovering over the last 15 years on my

0:21.9

journey to eradicate social anxiety and instill confidence, first in myself and then in every

0:28.5

single person that I meet on my journey. You're going to learn these tools and how to apply them

0:33.1

in your life now so that you can become the most free, powerful, bold, authentic version of you.

0:42.3

Welcome to today's episode of the show.

0:45.8

Today I am excited to share with you the second principle of sanity and victory that can

0:52.0

really set you up to feel so much more free in your life. This

0:55.9

one especially is going to set you up to feel way more free of anxiety, of stress, of worry about

1:03.6

what other people think of you, of so many negative patterns that can really detract either

1:10.3

from your enjoyment in life and also

1:12.9

your ability to create victory. That's why this list is sanity and victory. It's sanity I think

1:17.1

of as a sense of peace or flowing with life or living in a way that doesn't feel sabotaging

1:24.6

backwards, destined to cause endless suffering. That's insane, right?

1:30.3

And then victory is being able to create the life that you want to break through the challenges

1:35.3

to become ultimately who you were meant to be. I think that's the ultimate victory.

1:39.3

And that's not just some pithy magnet on your fridge kind of phrase. I think that's a very

1:45.1

meaningful pursuit in life to become who you're ultimately meant to be. And your goals might be

1:50.8

part of that. Your goals also might show you, you know, who you're not meant to be because you'll

1:55.5

achieve something and be like, huh, okay, I did that, but I don't think I'm any closer to who I'm

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