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I started having panic attacks and anxiety when I was nine years old.

They were confusing, they were isolating, they were terrifying, and they came out of nowhere.

And I think the problem with panic attacks is that a lot of times the thing you're scared about is irrational.

So there's no rhyme or reason for it.

So anybody from the outside will see you reacting to this stimuli and they'll say, well, it's not that big of a deal.

Just calm down, you know, and when you're in the middle of a panic attack it's just not possible.

So I've been dealing with a metaphobia which is the fear of vomit since I was a kid and

it's followed me through my entire life and I have spent a lot of time just avoiding situations where I

might encounter it and that looks really different when you're nine years old than it does

when you're in your 30s. You know I don't have kids because I'm scared of people throwing up.

That is the reason I don't have kids. It's the reason I didn't want to be pregnant.

It's like there are so many things in my life that are kind of tied to this fear and in my late 30s it was finally time for

...