Ratchet Radio begins in 3-2-1.

Live in the freedom that God loves you unconditionally, and He loves you unconditionally.

God's love for you is unconditional.

Preaching that God loves you unconditionally is the wrong message.

God has a good will towards everybody, believers and non-believers.

But there is another live reserved only for those who embrace the gospel and put their trust in Jesus as a word and Satan.

It's time for Ratchet Radio with Toad Freel.

In this dim fog, I still don't fully believe that Nick is gone.

I don't trust myself to believe it.

Even though I'm the one who wrote as a bitch-weary, I find myself reading it again and again to ensure that it's all true.

I've gone so far as to pinch myself to ask Ely and to assure me I'm awake.

What if I nodded off and this is all just an awful dream?

What if I'd fallen sick and this is some feverish nightmare?

What if I mistakenly popped the wrong pill and I'm now hallucinating?

Are those scenarios more likely than a young man just falling down dead?

I tapped Nick's name into my computer and find a news story.

Heartbroken, voice college students more in the abrupt death of Nick Chalice.

So it is true.

But somehow it still wouldn't shock me if my phone rang and I saw his name and heard his voice.

I'm hovering in this place between belief and disbelief, between certainty and doubt.

I don't know what to think, I don't know what to do, I don't know what to feel.

I don't even know what to feel about my faith about my God.

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