Sneaky Signs It's Time To Break Up (+ 4 Tips To Bring The Spark Back)

The Liz Moody Podcast

Liz Moody

Health & Fitness, Self-improvement, Education, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.9K Ratings

🗓️ 10 November 2025

⏱️ 26 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

If you’ve been questioning your relationship, want to arm yourself with red flags to look out for in the future, or want tips to keep the spark alive—I made this episode for you. I share the science behind how to know when it’s time to call it quits and when it’s worth working it through. Plus, I share some research-backed secrets for turning red flags into green ones. This isn’t about judgment or pressure; it’s about clarity. I’ll share exactly what to look for when I’m evaluating a relationship: from whether a partner expands your sense of self (or shrinks it), to how your nervous system responds around them. I’ll dive into powerful research from top psychologists including the #1 predictor of divorce with 94% accuracy, and what it actually means when someone makes you feel like too much, or not enough. 🎧What you’ll learn: How to know if your partner is helping you grow—or holding you back What anxiety around your partner could really be telling you The “Bird Theory” and why small bids for connection matter so much What the 4 Horsemen are (and why they predict most divorces) How to use micro-vulnerability, daily rituals, and weekly check-ins to rebuild What to do if you’re scared to leave—or scared to stay ✨ Homework: Try a 10-minute check-in with your partner this week. Ask: “What’s one way you felt supported by me?” and let me know how it goes. 👇Let me know in the comments: What’s one tool from this episode you’re going to try? Check out the previous episodes of The Liz Moody Podcast discussed today: How To Know If You’ve Found “The One”: The Science of Soulmates Fighting Can Make Your Relationship Better—If You Do It THIS Way with Drs Julie & John Gottman The Novelty Rule: How To Use My Neuroscience Hack That’s Changing Millions Of Lives Ready to uplevel every part of your life? Order Liz’s book 100 Ways to Change Your Life: The Science of Leveling Up Health, Happiness, Relationships & Success now! Connect with Liz on Instagram @lizmoody or online at www.lizmoody.com. Subscribe to the substack by visiting https://lizmoody.substack.com/welcome. Buy our cute sweatshirts, conversation cards, and more at https://shop.lizmoody.com/. Use our discount codes from our highly vetted and tested brand partners by visiting https://www.lizmoody.com/codes. To join The Liz Moody Podcast Club Facebook group, go to www.facebook.com/groups/thelizmoodypodcast. This episode is brought to you completely free thanks to the following podcast sponsors: AG1: visit DrinkAG1.com/LizMoody and get your FREE year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs today. Pique: go to PiqueLife.com/LizMoody for up to 20% off plus a special gift. Osmia: head to OsmiaSkincare.com and use code LIZMOODY2025 for 20% off your first order. Lumebox: visit TheLumeBox.com/Liz to get 40% off anytime. The Liz Moody Podcast cover art by Zack. The Liz Moody Podcast music by Alex Ruimy. Formerly the Healthier Together Podcast. This podcast and website represents the opinions of Liz Moody and her guests to the show. The content here should not be taken as medical advice. The content here is for information purposes only, and because each person is so unique, please consult your healthcare professional for any medical questions. The Liz Moody Podcast Episode 380 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Maybe you've been in a rut for a while.
0:01.8	Maybe you don't like each other's friends.
0:04.0	Maybe if you see their socks on the floor one more time, you will literally go insane. But are the reasons to break up? Today we're getting into the science behind how to know when it's time to call it quits and when it's worth working through. Whether you're in a relationship and you want to make sure that you're not checking these boxes, or you want to arm yourself with red flags to look out for in the future.
0:23.3	This episode will help you figure out
0:24.7	exactly when to stay and when to go. And I'm going to share some research back secrets for
0:29.5	turning red flags into green ones. Welcome to the Liz Moody podcast where we share science-back tools and tips to empower you to live your best life.
0:41.5	But we do it in a way that's fun that makes space for emotions, vulnerability, and the realities of our actual lives.
0:47.7	I'm your host, Liz Moody, and I'm a longtime journalist and best-selling author.
0:51.3	We have already tackled my very unconventional take on how to know if somebody
0:55.4	is your soulmate. I can link that episode for you if you want to listen to it after this one. And today,
1:00.3	we are diving into the opposite side of things. How to know when to call it quits. I want to preface this
1:06.4	by saying that only you know the inside of your relationship and only you can obviously make the
1:11.2	call of whether it is truly serving you. But there is some interesting science and some
1:16.1	interesting advice from top relationship experts that I think is worth exploring and serves as good
1:21.6	food for thought. I'm going to count them down from four and while they are all red flags,
1:26.6	number one is the biggest.
1:28.4	If it is happening in your relationship, research shows that there is over a 90% chance that it
1:33.9	won't work out. All right. Jumping in with number four, do they expand you or do they shrink you?
1:40.3	A good relationship should add to your life and far, far too many people and especially
1:45.5	women are in relationships that are limiting them. This can be in perspective. They're making
1:50.5	you think smaller. It can be in opportunity. They discourage you from trying new things,
1:55.5	from meeting new people, or pursuing your biggest dreams. It can be in identity. Instead of helping you become who you want to
	...

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