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From the New York Times and WBUR Boston, this is Modern Love.

Stories of Love, Laws, and Redemption.

I'm your host, Megna Chakrabardi.

Nicole Hardy was single, 35 years old, and struggling with her church's requirement that she stay celibate before marriage.

But struggle is very different from action, and that next step would change her life.

Justina Machado of 6 feet under and the Netflix series One Day at a Time reads Nicole's essay, single, female, Mormon, alone.

Of all the places I felt sure I'd never go, plan parenthood, top the list.

Because, you know, they perform abortions and give condoms to kids or so I'd been warned.

Yet one spring afternoon found me in its waiting room next to a teenage girl who was clearly confused by the intake form and likely bound for an uncomfortable four minutes in the back of a borrowed car.

But what did I know? I was a 35-year-old virgin preparing for my own first time, which incidentally didn't happen until I was well into 36.

I wasn't frigid, fearful, or socially inept, not overweight or unattractive.

I didn't suffer from halitosis or social anxiety disorder.

I was a practicing Mormon and Mormon's weight until marriage.

So I had waited, spent the first two decades of my adult life celibate and for the most part alone.

Because only after the trial of my faith would I be blessed with an eternal marriage which I prayed would also blow my mind in the bedroom.

It never occurred to me that I would remain unmarried.

Especially in a system where marriage is not only a commandment, but also one of life's primary purposes.

Turns out though that there is no place in that community for a single woman who doesn't want children.

My only available choice within the church was to wait for my reward in heaven.

As Mormon doctrine promises that single members denied marriage, family, and sex lives on earth will have them after death.

Needless to say, this was not a compelling argument.

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