Shirley Ballas on "Disastrous Relationships" And The Dark Side Of Strictly!

We Need To Talk with Paul C. Brunson

FlightStory

Relationships, Society & Culture, Leisure

4.7 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 30 September 2025

⏱️ 100 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Strictly Come Dancing’s head judge Shirley Ballas joins us for an exclusive conversation about her extraordinary life on and off the dance floor. She also reflects on the loss of her brother David, and why she now campaigns to raise awareness around men’s mental health and suicide prevention. From her early years on a Merseyside council estate to global fame, Shirley shares the resilience, heartbreak, and lessons that shaped her. She opens up about her family heritage, the bullying she endured through school years and beyond, and the sacrifices she made to rise to the top of the dance world. She speaks candidly about her relationships, turbulent love affairs and lifelong struggles with body image. Shirley also takes us behind the scenes of Strictly Come Dancing - from a “disastrous” first audition to navigating the highs and lows of being on one of the biggest shows on television. Shirley shares: ◽ How discovering her family heritage reshaped her identity ◽ The bullying that left lasting scars - and how she found strength through dance ◽ Walking away from a marriage at the peak of her career - and the regrets that followed ◽ The pressures of body image in the dance world and her experiences with surgery ◽ The moment her Strictly audition went wrong - and how she turned it around ◽ The toll of online trolling and public criticism as head judge ◽ Why championing men’s mental health is so important to her ◽ What happiness means today Shirley Ballas, We Need To Talk If you’re struggling, you don’t have to face it alone. We’ve included support charities below: Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM): https://g2ul0.app.link/npaQKXUV4Wb Samaritans - call on 116 123 or visit https://g2ul0.app.link/xghDmmYV4Wb Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/needtotalk https://www.tiktok.com/@weneedtotalkpod Follow Shirley: Instagram: https://g2ul0.app.link/EGAa8y0V4Wb TikTok: https://g2ul0.app.link/rAaQ8f3V4Wb Best Foot Forward: https://g2ul0.app.link/So4hbb5V4Wb (00:00) Intro (02:08) Otto and Shirley's Heritage (06:49) Shirley's Upbringing in the Wirral (09:15) Shirley's Experience of School (12:10) How Shirley Became Obsessed with Dance (15:06) Moving to London at 16 (18:40) Moving to Manchester and Starting Her Latin Dance Career (22:13) Class in the UK and How It Relates to the Dance Industry (29:56) How Shirley Met Corky Ballas (35:46) Does Shirley Regret Leaving Sammy for Corky? (44:42) Why Shirley and Corky's Relationship Came to an End (48:16) Tinder Ad (49:16) Adobe Express Ad (50:34) How Shirley Came to Be on Strictly Come Dancing (55:10) The Enduring Popularity of Strictly (01:00:37) Would Paul Go on Strictly? (01:01:41) Who Is Shirley's Fantasy Strictly Contestant? (01:03:05) Who Is the Biggest Surprise During Shirley's Time on Strictly? (01:04:32) The Importance of Shirley's Brother David to Her Life (01:14:41) Shirley's Battle With Body Image (01:22:12) Shirley Reads a Letter to Her Younger Self (01:25:44) Most Memorable Conversation (01:31:16) Shirley and Celebs Go Dating (01:37:38) Paul's Takeaways Sponsored by: Tinder: https://tinder.com/en-GB Adobe Express: https://ADOBE.LY/PAUL Get Your Tickets to the Love Better Tour! Bristol - https://g2ul0.app.link/mt5I2RKhrXb Cardiff - https://g2ul0.app.link/5mZIoBNhrXb Glasgow - https://g2ul0.app.link/FMk3N4PhrXb Birmingham - https://g2ul0.app.link/pJIj4XShrXb Manchester - https://g2ul0.app.link/4SQwKDXhrXb Brighton - https://g2ul0.app.link/BO71HSZhrXb London - https://g2ul0.app.link/gm6iB91hrXb Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey Jack, I'm seeing your business everywhere. Have you got a new marketing person or something?
0:04.8	You could say I've got a new secret weapon for print. Print? Oh, Vista print, right? That's not a secret.
0:10.8	How did you know? Come on. Custom posters, branded mugs, stylish flyers. Only one place prints all that. Vista print.
0:17.7	Yeah, I got business cards, stickers, t-shirts, booklets, signage, even photo books from my last holiday.
0:23.2	Print everything for your business with VistaPrint.
0:25.9	If you need it, we print it at vistoprint.co.uk.
0:30.0	If my brother hadn't been the way you was, I wouldn't be saved here.
0:33.9	Would you say your brother saved you?
0:38.6	I don't think I was put on planet Earth to have somebody to love me.
0:42.4	I think I'm on planet Earth to get the dancers to where they need to be.
0:46.9	Let's unpack that.
0:48.9	At 18, I married Sammy.
0:50.6	Before I knew it, we were hero to hero.
0:53.0	Nobody came near us.
0:55.4	We were at the top of the industry.
1:00.9	And then I suddenly left. I told Sammy I was in love with somebody else. And three months after I'd been with Corky, I knew I'd made a mistake. And then I get pregnant. When I got on strictly,
1:07.0	I said, no one's going to want a 57-year-old lady to go into TV. For the thousands and thousands
1:12.5	of wonderful compliments that I got, I'd focus on the negative ones. People doing stick figures
1:18.9	with my face on and coffins and die you bitch. Charlie, what happened with your brother?
1:23.8	He just went into a dark hole with depression. I said, why don't you come up for the weekend?
1:28.3	He goes, no, I'm feeling much better.
1:30.0	And he took his own life that weekend.
	...

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