Hey, everybody, it's your Judge John Hodgman.

This is a really wonderful episode about two women who are getting married and have a dispute

about a book collection, but one of them also owns a Python and they feed that Python,

what we should call natural python food.

Rats.

It might gross you add a little bit, so if it's not for you, check the show notes

at maximum fun.org, where we'll give the time stamps for when that conversation happens,

and you can just skip ahead of it. But if you love conversations about Python's eating,

this episode is for you. And the rest of it's for you, too.

Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bail of Jesse Thorn. This week,

shelf incrimination. Haley brings the case against her fiancé, Natasha. Haley loves Natasha.

Natasha loves books. Natasha is training to be a librarian and her personal library

fills up 10 bookcases. Haley can't wait to move in with Natasha this summer, but Haley wants

to limit how many books Natasha can bring to their new place. Specifically, Haley wants to set the limit at zero books.

Who's right, who's wrong, only one can decide, please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom

and presents an obscure cultural reference. It wasn't until I started reading and found books

they wouldn't let us read in school that I learned.

You could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everyone else.

Bail of Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigants in.

Haley and Natasha, please rise and raise your right hands.

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

So help you, God or whatever. I do. I do. Do you swear to tell the truth of the whole truth and nothing but the truth? So help you, God or whatever.

...