Sex Crime Sandwich w/ Joe DeRosa | Your Mom's House Ep. 820

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom Segura

Comedy, Relationships, Society & Culture, Tv & Film, Comedy Interviews

4.7 • 23.4K Ratings

🗓️ 23 July 2025

⏱️ 103 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

SPONSORS: - Shop outdoor furniture, grills, lawn games, and WAY more for WAY less. Head to https://Wayfair.com right now to explore a HUGE outdoor selection. - Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/momshouse - Go to https://ThriveMarket.com/YMH, to get thirty percent off your first order, plus a FREE sixty dollar gift just for signing up. Tom’s fasting, Christina’s gassy, and Joe DeRosa is back with a brand new comedy special and hot sandwich takes about a major New York institution. The show kicks off with a debate over whether fighter pilots could get away with call signs like “Stanky Cock” or “Big Dick.” The Main Mommies next dive deep into the aftermath of their staff psych evals, with borderline revelations, some tampon talk, and a real concern for Enny’s suspiciously normal results. Tom also opens up about his multi-day fast, shrinking penis, and terrifying wellness advice, while Christina celebrates colonics as feminist self-care. Then, Joe DeRosa enters the chat. The trio debates Hitler as a motivational speaker, Dan Peña’s castle energy, building houses on famous murder sites, and the growing arms race of celebrity sex criminals. Joe also dishes on Bradley Cooper visiting his sandwich shop, fantasizes about quitting comedy to work at Best Buy, and breaks down his bleak-but-hilarious new special I Never Promised You a Rose Garden. Plus: forklift fails, Cosby court swagger, Lena Dunham's cones, and how to turn fart jars and armpits into financial freedom. Your Mom’s House Ep. 820 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:08:51 - Opening Clip: I'm Ryan 00:23:11 - Brad Pitt In Fight Club Skinny 00:31:05 - Lena Dunham 00:37:05 - Clip: Bottled Farts 00:39:49 - Joe DeRosa, Dan Pena, & Murder Houses 00:48:28 - The Cosby Problem 00:59:22 - Woody Allen & Roman Polanski 01:13:33 - Drunk News Anchor 01:17:23 - Joe's New Special & Best Buy Fantasy 01:26:27 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:30:47 - Joey Roses Sandwiches 01:40:30 - Closing Song - "2 Catches (Obviously) By Odd-Track Numbers Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, everyone. Don't miss my Come Together tour. I'll be in Athens, Georgia on Friday, August 29th, and Windsor, Ontario on September 4th.
0:08.8	I've also added a second show in Akron, Ohio, and will be there on September 6 and 7th. Tickets and all info is at tombsagora.com slash tour.
0:19.8	Welcome. Welcome to your mom's house.
0:29.6	Rated T for teen.
0:31.1	Each year, thousands of adults lose their shred.
0:34.8	It's an epidemic simply known as shred loss, but it doesn't have to be this way because rekindling your shred is as easy as playing the new Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 and 4. With new parks, cross-platform multiplayer, and sick new game modes, we can put an end to shred loss everywhere. Let the new Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 and 4 and show the world that the shred's not dead.
0:56.5	Get Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 and 4 available now.
0:59.7	Welcome to the program.
1:01.6	I'm Tom, of course, sitting here with my partner, fart dog.
1:06.9	It's Lieutenant Fart Dog.
1:08.6	Lieutenant Fart Dog, Lieutenant Fart Dog.
1:13.4	Special operations instructor. You know, we were watching Top Gun.
1:17.2	Maverick.
1:17.8	Maverick.
1:18.9	And we were wondering if anybody is in the Air Force,
1:22.4	if you could tell us if you have ever had a call sign like Fart Dog or anything remotely inappropriate. Inappropriate, yeah. Because we were wondering if you could get away with being call sign farted. It's all like rooster and joker and, yeah, like what about like tit slops or something, you know. Old big dick, because you know those guys. That would be the first one. Stanky cock, yeah. I don't know about, they probably just stanky.
1:45.1	Just stanky?
1:45.9	They wouldn't say stanky cock wouldn't be your call sign. But what is the stanky in reference to your balls or your dick? But the thing is, I think the only way to get away with a thing like a stanky would be because your commanding officer would be like, what? and then they'd have to, you'd have to spin it and be like, you know, never showers.
1:44.2	And they're like, right.
1:45.0	And then the real thing is that like well
2:05.3	his dick stinks because he's he does it so much with chicks yeah he's a big banger thanks oh my god
2:11.7	oh my god i hooked up with a 26 year old and it was good my god I'm so proud of you like it was awesome I'm so
	...

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