SelfWork YGTG: This Short Poem Describes Incredible Change and How To Make It
The SelfWork Podcast
Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
4.8 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 14 June 2022
⏱️ 4 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
I use all kinds of stories and metaphors in therapy to help people actually remember a point. I’m not sure when I started doing it, but there’s something about a story or a picture that cements or anchors an idea in your mind. Just think about in Forrest Gump, the famous “Life is like a box of chocolates” and you’ll understand.
So today, I want to read you a poem that I use all the time in therapy. The author, Portia Nelson was an American popular singer, songwriter, actress, and author. In 1965, she portrayed the cantankerous Sister Berthe in the film version of The Sound of Music,and on TV's All My Children Nelson played the long-running role of nanny Mrs. Gurney. Her book of poetic musings, There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery, became a mainstay of twelve-step programs.
Here's Portia's poem that can act as an anchor for you!
“I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes me a long time to get out.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in. It's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault. I get out immediately.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
I walk down another street.”
― Portia Nelson, There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Hi and welcome to Selfwork. This is a special YGTG or you get the gist because I'm going |
| 0:13.4 | to talk about the stories and metaphors that I use in therapy to help people actually |
| 0:18.2 | remember a point. I'm going to actually read you a wonderful poem that I use. I'm not sure |
| 0:22.9 | exactly when I started using this technique, but there's something about a story or a picture |
| 0:28.5 | that cements or anchors an idea in your mind. Just think about in Forest Gump, the famous |
| 0:34.4 | life is like a box of chocolates and you'll understand that's the use of metaphor. The author of |
| 0:41.6 | this poem is Portia Nelson. She actually was born Betty Mae Nelson and she was an American |
| 0:47.0 | popular singer, songwriter, actress, and author. In fact, you can hear the thunder. In the sound |
| 0:53.2 | of music, she was Sister Bertha in 1965 and she was on TV's All My Children as she played the long |
| 1:01.1 | running role of Nanny, the Mrs. Gurney. And actually this poem has become a mainstay of 12 |
| 1:07.3 | step programs, interestingly enough. I think it helps us all understand and again kind of anchor |
| 1:13.1 | the idea about the transitions and transformations of going from inside to actual change, |
| 1:20.4 | which listeners of self work and I'm glad you're one of them have heard me say before. |
| 1:24.8 | That's what has to happen for you to feel hopeful. Not only do I understand my struggle and my |
| 1:30.2 | mistakes and my vulnerabilities, I can learn to anticipate them, see them, manage them, |
| 1:35.8 | and not keep making the same mistake over and over again, which I know I do. I'm sure you do. |
| 1:43.6 | So maybe this poem will help because Portia says all this very simply, |
| 1:47.3 | and I hope it anchors a picture that you can see in your mind. |
| 1:52.6 | I walk down the street. There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I'm lost. I'm helpless. |
| 2:00.3 | But it's in my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. I walk down the same street. |
| 2:06.7 | There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. |
| 2:13.0 | I can't believe I'm in the same place, but it isn't my fault. |
... |
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