Amazon offers employees up to £8,000 for education and training, like Juliet.

She's now a trained technician.

And to her, the sound of machinery in need of repair, reminds her of how far she's come.

In two years, she's landed her dream job, providing her with valuable skills.

That's up to £8,000 for education and training at Amazon. Eligibility conditions apply. All right.

All right.

Wow.

Wow.

Usually to hear applause like that, I have to strip at the company picnic.

Happy Monday, everyone.

So two illegals have been arrested for stealing Christy Noem's purse at a restaurant.

The two suspects are in custody, and the restaurant is now taking applications for dishwasher and busboy.

The White House placed yard signs with mugshots of illegals they've arrested and crimes they committed.

The move was criticized by Democrats and landscapers.

Illegal immigrants complained that now they will have to mow around themselves.

Hundreds of DEA agents rated an underground nightclub in Colorado.

Agents allegedly found drug use, prostitution, and my missing turtleneck.

President Trump was slammed by the media for wearing a blue suit to Pope Francis's funeral,

overlooking Zelensky, who was dressed like Janet Jackson from the Rhythm Nation 1994.

Meanwhile, Joe Biden smiled and took photos at the funeral of Pope Francis. It was quite a step up from the last time he saw the Pope when instead

of taking a selfie, he took a dumpy. Remember that? This week, Kamala Harris will give her first public remarks since leaving office in January.

And to prepare, she's been working with two new speechwriters named Gray and Goose.

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