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Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of IHeart Radio.

Good morning. This is Laura.

Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

Today's tip is to gossip for good. That is, say nice things about people that you suspect they'll overhear, or that will be repeated back to them. This is one of the best ways to make people feel good about themselves.

A few months ago, I had an experience that you may have had too.

Several of us were using a new video platform for a call, and as I came in a bit late from

trying to figure it out, it was clear the others were talking and that they hadn't seen

that I had joined.

In the span of ten seconds before they figured out I was there, one of the other participants said

something nice about me. Not only was I relieved that they weren't complaining about my tardiness,

I got the warm, fuzzy feeling that comes from hearing a compliment that I wasn't intended to hear.

It got me thinking about the importance of gossiping for good. It's easy to

bond with people by talking about other people. But even with people we like, we can sometimes say

things that border on complaint. I don't know why we so often resort to negativity as we try to establish common ground.

But I do know that it's not necessarily a great idea long term.

And if we're not going to stop talking about other people, maybe we can try to make at least some of the talk positive.

There's a good chance our words will get back to the person we're talking

about. So, best to say things that if they do get back to the person, or if the person overhears

them, they'll feel good about. This is especially true with kids. Kids can indeed be maddening

and exhausting. But we're all around the house 24-7 right now.

A complaint said behind a closed door on a cell phone will still be heard. So will a compliment.

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