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Welcome to the Late Show, ladies and gentlemen.

I'm your host Stephen Colbert. Folks. there. Welcome to the late show, ladies and gentlemen.

I'm your host Stephen Colbert.

Folks.

I don't pretend to be news.

This is a late night show, okay? and I try not to get swept up in the

sensationalism of the modern news grind but when history is being made I can't

ignore it which is why tonight's top story is an Ontario man's eight-foot zucchini might be the longest in the world.

Which of course raises the question, is that a world record in your garden?

Are you just happy zucchini?

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