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Transcript

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0:00.0	Greetings, pod races. The following series of horrible decisions is not real. Remember when our hero
0:10.6	strolled into a portal like that was a good idea? Well, nothing I can do about that right now. I'm
0:15.4	busy by this exhaust vent trying to get past my own bunker security system.
0:19.3	Please enter verbal access code. What the hell is a verbal access code? An observation about
0:27.0	someone else that doesn't contain dog whistle judgments in the form of cruel adverb choices.
0:32.0	Oh screw that. I'm going to have to break this security system spirit. Now, open your mind,
0:37.9	put those expectations on a high shelf and enjoy the show.
0:57.0	Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of food. I just want to point out
1:09.3	I found this guy's I found this creepy organ. Whoa, and I don't know how to play the piano, but it
1:15.3	just works. Watch. Wait, are you doing that? Mm-hmm. That's pretty good. Yeah, thanks anyway. Anyway,
1:22.8	okay, hello from the magic. Wait, let me try. Okay. Oh, you're so bad at it.
1:29.2	Here, let me try. I'm very, very good at playing the organ. What is going on?
1:37.6	Yeah, why? Is it because you got tiny badgy fingers? Badgy fingies, please.
1:42.0	I'm sorry, badgy fengies. Badgy my fingies. Anyway, hello from the magic tavern. A weekly podcast
1:47.2	from the magical land of food. I'm your host, starting a kneecamp. You've never listened to the pod
1:50.0	guys before. There's everything you need to know about three and a half years ago. I fell through
1:53.2	a dimensional portal behind a burger hang at Chicago to the magical land of food. Thank God, you
1:56.5	thought to bring the equipment as we walk through the portal. Yeah, yeah, exactly. That's right. We
2:01.5	were just in the Vermilion Minotaur, which we had snuck into. We dove through the portal,
2:05.3	but the Dark Lord used to dove is a strong word. We stepped through the portal that the Dark Lord
2:11.7	used to sneak into Hogsface. And I now win this creepy castle. Yeah, it's so spooky. Yeah, I thought
2:18.8	it was spooky. And you know what? It hasn't been a whole week, but I was like, let's just start
	...

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