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Lez Hang Out | A Lesbian Podcast

SBG 99: Aquamarine with Mermaid Kristin Sparkle a.k.a. Kristin Murison

Lez Hang Out | A Lesbian Podcast

Lez Hang Out

Personal Journals, Tv & Film, Society & Culture

4.7545 Ratings

🗓️ 6 February 2023

⏱️ 81 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

“We make things gay every 2 weeks and somehow it’s gayer than ever.” This week, Leigh (@lshfoster) and Ellie (@elliebrigida) hang out with Mermaid Kristin Sparkle a.k.a. Lez Hang Out’s production assistant, Kristin Murison (@therealksparkle), to talk about why the 2006 film Aquamarine Should’ve Been Gay. If you haven’t seen the movie, the plot is basically this: Two baby gays, played by Emma Roberts and JoJo (neither of whom could ever read as straight if they tried), find a mermaid in their swimming pool after doing witchcraft at a sleepover (#justgirlythings) and then proceed to throuple up with her and save the world through the powers of friendship and lesbianism. We can’t really blame them for falling for her, because within like 5 minutes of meeting, the mermaid Aquamarine is encouraging the girls to touch her tail and being incredibly flirtatious with them. It turns out Aqua swam away to escape an arranged heterosexual marriage to a man she doesn’t love. Her dad doesn’t believe love exists, because he has never seen it. The entire premise of that is extremely queer, because it’s very possible that the reason mermaids have not found love yet is because they are only looking into heterosexual pairings. The implication here is that all mermaids are queer, which honestly, is so valid of them.  Somehow things get even gayer as the movie progresses. Aqua’s whole mission is to get someone to fall in love with her and prove to her dad that love exists. Who is known to fall in love that quickly? Lesbians. Of course the man she chooses, ie. the first man she laid eyes on, does not love her yet, it’s been like a day. But you know who does already love her? The little baby lesbians. In the end, the girls risk their lives to save Aqua and realize that they love her the same way that they love each other. When they tell her, she realizes she loves them too and one of her happy tears falls into the ocean causing her dad to immediately cease his rage storm. Her dad now knows love really does exist. But, canonically, he only knows gay love exists. He has zero proof that heterosexual love is a real thing. Aquamarine goes back to her pod to spread the gay agenda like an aquatic lesbian Jesus and we can only assume that all the previously loveless mermaids are now happily pairing off into queer partnerships, throuples, and polycules.  We know one thing for sure, Aquamarine Should’ve Been Gay. Follow along on Twitter: Lez Hang Out (@lezhangoutpod) and answer our Q & Gay at the end of every episode. Leigh Holmes Foster (@lshfoster) and Ellie Brigida (@elliebrigida). You can also join us on Facebook.com/lezhangoutpod and follow along on Instagram (@lezhangoutpod).  If you love Lez Hang Out, please show your support by voting for us in the 2023 Queerty Awards #Queerties. We are nominated for Best LGBTQ+ Podcast alongside some incredibly talented people! Vote once a day/device until February 21st. Want to support the show while unlocking a bunch of awesome perks like access to our exclusive Discord community, monthly bonus episodes, weekly ad free episodes, exclusive merch, special Patron-only events, and more? Join us on Patreon at bit.ly/lezpatreon. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/lezhangoutpod. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Let's hang out.

0:02.7

Let's hang out.

0:03.8

And let's talk about what lessons are found.

0:06.4

Let's hang out.

0:07.3

And let's listen to two hesby and shout.

0:09.9

Let's hang out.

0:14.0

Hey, everyone.

0:15.1

Welcome back to Les Hangout.

0:16.3

I'm Ellie Bridgeta.

0:17.6

And I'm Lee Holmes Foster.

0:19.0

And here's what's happening this week.

0:20.5

This week in the

0:22.6

Lesdom is a place where we can touch base each episode about things going on with the podcast

0:28.6

or otherwise. We want to remind you all that we still have some spots open for our Trova trip to

0:34.9

Croatia in September. You can sign up at bit.ly slash Lesdrew

0:39.9

Croatia. We have three more early bird spots left that are being subsidized by a very

0:45.4

lovely patron of ours. We also want to remind everyone in season six, we have special

0:50.3

bonus episodes going up on our Patreon. So if you want to catch our latest episode,

0:55.6

which just came out on everything everywhere all at once, get all ready for the Oscars,

1:00.6

or catch any of the other episodes that we've put up, you can find all of them at bit.ly slash

1:05.3

Les Patreon. We are so excited because we have been nominated for a Queerty Award for Best Podcast, which is

1:12.6

amazing. It's our second time being nominated, crazy. And you can vote every single day until

...

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