You're listening to a Stranger podcast, www.com.

If you're stuck in a relationship quandary, or if you're looking for sexual harmony,

while there's nothing you can't ask on the Savage Podcast.

Hey everybody.

I'm Dan Savage.

Welcome to the podcast.

I, before we get to your calls, a couple weeks ago, I was totally obsessed with the

old Spice Centaur and the creation of a whole generation of centaur fetishes.

And I hate to just be a corporate stooge and a lackey, but I've been traveling a lot,

spending a lot of high in my hotel rooms, watching a lot of TV.

And I've been catching this commercial for Quiznos and their new fast food-ish product

called a Toasty Torpedo.

I don't know if you've seen it, but it's basically this kind of cute,aggy hair dimwitted boy who has a Dom sub relationship with a toaster oven that is the filthiest fucking thing on TV.

It is gay porn in a Quiznos ad, which is so weird because who's the market for crappy fast food?

Like straight boys?

And does straight boys really respond to the idea of having a dom-sub relationship with a male-identified toaster oven that says things to you like, put it in me, Scott, in a male voice?

And that makes straight guys want to go buy these toasty torpedoes, which are basically 12-inch-long sandwich-cocks that they shove down their throats? Apparently it does. Like, being gay is really hip, I guess, that if you can make it a little abstract, like it's a toaster oven and you can still be the dom. You can still be the insertive partner in the relationship, even though you're submissive. Straight boys respond.

You should look that ad up.

Go to YouTube, look up Quiznos and put it in me, Scott.

And you will be shocked and appalled by what you see.

This episode is brought to you by Adam and Eve.com where you can find over 18,000 adult entertainment products for every lifestyle.

To receive 50% off most any item,

...