Savage Love Episode 1015

Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage

Relationships, Society & Culture, Sexuality, Health & Fitness

4.6 • 6.4K Ratings

🗓️ 21 April 2026

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Sometimes the questions we get here at Savage Lovecast Industries™ are nothing but pragmatic. A man with a moldy home asks how he can properly dry his Fleshlight. Seems important. A woman fell off a trapeze 15 years ago and has suffered sexual dysfunction ever since. Dan brings on pelvic floor therapist Dr. Rachel Gelman to discuss her case and to call out doctors who belittle sexual concerns. When a unicorn is unhappy, the universe seizes up for a second. This woman made it crystal clear that she was NOT interested in any of that butt stuff. But what did the man in the couple do? Can you guess? He tried to poke her in her butt! She plans to berate him in a public place. But what exactly should she say, and can she ever trust him again? On the Magnum, Dan brings on comedian Conor Janda to discuss the old "fag hag" relationship that has drifted away with queer acceptance and inclusion. What's the difference between a "girl's gay" and a "gay's gay" and who would you rather be? They also advise a middle-aged widower who is dropping everything, moving to NYC to become a stand-up comic and diving headlong into gay sex. And here's the kind of call that gives monogamy a bad reputation. He loves his wife so much. But she is done with sex, and does not approve of open relationships. So what is he to do? He did the right thing! He recorded his question and sent it in to Q@Savage.Love He also could have called 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From bondage to bisexuality, cuckolding to crossdressing and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage is a cultural force for sex positivity, when we most need it.

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to the Savage Lovecast, Dan Savage's Sex and Relationship Show for grownups.
0:05.1	If you're under 18, get out of here, young un.
0:08.8	If you're stuck in a relationship quandary,
0:12.7	or if you're looking for sexual harmony,
0:18.3	well, there's nothing you can't ask on the Savage Lovecast.
0:26.6	I'm reading an interesting study right now about something that's come up on the show,
0:30.7	the connection, if any, between traumatic sexual experiences early in life
0:34.2	and an interest later in life in kink.
0:36.9	If it were a normal week around here,
0:38.7	I might have talked about it at the top of the show. I mean, I kind of am talking about it right
0:42.9	now at the top of the show. What I mean is I would have talked about this study at greater
0:47.3	length at the top of the show, barring a breaking sex scandal about GOP dudes with huge balloon
0:52.5	boobs or Dick Pick sending congressional staff harassing
0:56.2	democratic creeps. But I got to be brief this week as I am on the road. But I will definitely
1:01.3	talk about this study another time. Might invite the authors to come on the show and talk with me.
1:06.0	If you're interested in reading it in the meantime, look for childhood, sexual abuse, adult
1:10.8	attachment styles,
1:11.6	and involvement in BDSM practices and adult intimate relationships, lead author, Maja Seleck,
1:17.3	published in behavioral sciences. And yes, we will put a link in the show notes. Anyway,
1:22.7	instead of a full-blown intro this week, you're going to get a plug for an event that I am doing. I'm very excited
1:29.3	about this. I should have told you about it weeks ago, hell, months ago. So you would have more
1:34.3	notice in case you wanted to join me in New York City at Sessions Live, May 15th and 16th at Pioneer
	...

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