Sasheer Is Pretty Sure Ranch Dressing DOES Expire

Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata

Headgum

Comedy

4.9 • 5K Ratings

🗓️ 21 April 2021

⏱️ 46 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Nicole and Sasheer DO have a theme song and you'll hear it in today's intro. They also discuss Nicole sending creepy things to her sister, the shelf life of ranch dressing, pondering where Nicole's boyfriend is, vision boards, the Olson sisters and the Olson Twins album, Raven Symoné, and how many people you know in your city. Then they take the quiz Answer Three Questions and We'll Give You A Signature Catchphrase. And for the grand finale, they give advice to your questions about productivity, and A CULT infiltrating the workplace. Email or call Nicole & Sasheer with your friendship questions at: nicoleandsasheer@gmail.com

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Bap, Bap, Bap, Bap, Bap, Bap, Bap, Bap, Bup Bap Boo Boo Doo Doo. Doo Boo Boo Bap. Bap! Bap! best phrase.
0:26.8	We do have a theme song.
0:29.0	Yeah, we didn't need to create a theme song at all.
0:32.7	One has been created for us.
0:34.9	But sometimes it's just fun to make sounds with your mouth.
0:38.8	Absolutely.
0:40.3	So, Shear, how are you?
0:42.8	I'm good.
0:43.5	How are you?
0:45.2	Pretty good.
0:47.3	Can't complain.
0:49.3	I accidentally sent some chotchkes that I bought to my sister.
0:56.1	So, okay.
0:57.2	Did I tell you about when I sent her the Molly doll from American Girls?
1:00.3	Yes.
1:01.4	So I accidentally sent her a Cherry Mary muffin doll.
1:05.2	I sent her Apple Amy, who's a little black one.
1:08.3	And Catherine was like, who someone sent me a doll again? And I was
1:13.4	like, honestly, if you are sent something weird, assume it is me. And then ask me why I've sent it.
1:20.2	And I was like, this case, I accidentally had your address from the last time I sent you something
1:26.7	creepy saved on eBay. So just, you know, forward it to me. And then I sent her these sunglasses I had bought. And she was like, someone sent me sunglasses with flowers on them? And I was like, yes, those are for me. Please send them to me. She said she would. She kept giving her a job to do. I know. I'm bad.
2:05.8	You actually did that to me. You sent me a whole box of sparkling water. And I was like, why did you, you know I don't like sparkling water? You know, I don't like sparkling anything. And you're like, yes. That's because your address was saved for the last thing I sent you. Yeah. And I sent my friend Priyanka, who won drag race Canada.
	...

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