Hey, hey, hey, what is up you guys? Welcome to another mini-series episode. Today we are talking about how to walk with the confidence that says, sorry? Not sorry.

That's right. We're taking that from Demi Lovata today. And you guys, this mini-series episode coincides with chapter four of my book, okay?

And also really compliments the episode I recently did with the incredibly epic Chandler Moore of Maverick City Music. Before we get into this short discussion, I just have a few questions to ask you.

How do we find the courage to walk in self-acceptance in environments where people choose not to fight against their preconceived ideas or get out of their comfort bubbles to learn more about us?

How do we feel loved even when we don't feel as though we belong? Where do we really belong? And is it possible to find that place for ourselves? Along the way, how can we accept and maybe even anticipate the hard truth that sometimes we might be misunderstood?

Now friends, those questions are actually taken from chapter four of my book, which I can't wait for you to get your hands on. And almost like 10 days, what is even happening here? You guys, it's so crazy.

Today, this is what we're talking about. We're talking about fitting in versus belonging and specifically how we can walk with a confidence that says, sorry, not sorry.

Now finding my own sense of belonging has been a lifelong track for me. And honestly, I'm still in the midst of really figuring that out and walking it out.

But what I know for sure is if we don't find a way to true belonging, the environments where we feel understood or not accepted will crush our souls and maybe even have the potential to compromise our identities in some ways.

Now, I don't want that for you as much as I don't want that for me. I want you so deeply to know your inherent worth and value, regardless of whether other people do.

And in the book, I actually talk about an entire story in my childhood of being bullied and how because of that bullying, I changed and morphed things about myself just to be accepted because the pain of being bullied and not being understood felt so hard and made me feel so isolated.

Now, that is just in my middle school, but that has happened throughout my life in other various ways.

Now, the tough part about belonging is that we can search and search and search and jump around from place to place or job to job or friend group to friend group, but we will be hard pressed to find any sort of environment where every person accepts us.

In fact, I recently heard it said that at minimum at least 10% of people are not going to like you at least at minimum. Okay, so we go out there trying to make people like us trying to fit in with everybody around us.

But the reality is we could be the mother Teresa of the planet and there still be internet trolls, though was there will still be people who do not like us.

My girl, Brenne Brown. Well, you guys at least I want to think that she's my girl. I love Brenne Brown. Please tell her that her number one fan is over here.

I mentioned her so many different times in my book is honestly hilarious. She talks about belonging and she talks about belonging being one of our core human needs.

Okay, and she also says that the opposite of belonging is fitting in trying to fit in with the crowd. So what is fitting in fitting in is assessing the scene and trying to acclimate accordingly fitting in is about upholding a standard of what we think others want us to be.

It's about thinking what we need to say or what we need to wear or what we need to look like or our bodies need to look like or what job we need to have just to impress other people or to fit in with people around us.

And in the process of trying to fit in we actually lose sight of the things that make us truly us.

I say this specifically in chapter four. I say fitting in is not belonging. It's abandoning our identity. It's for going the unique things that make us us. It's rejecting how we were created for a fleeting superficial like that will never last.

And let me quote Brene Brown once again y'all she says this about belonging true belonging does not require you to change who you are.

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