From the Jill Schwartz Memorial Library here in the wilds of Connecticut, this is Obscure

Season 2, Frankenstein.

I am your host, your friend, your ear lover, literary mansplainer in chief and geogenologist,

Michael Ian Black, on Tenter Hooks, as we begin this episode.

Tenter Hooks because the story is getting good, but also because it's pizza night here

in the black household, Friday nights or pizza nights, and it's getting on Friday night.

I'm recording on a Friday and I know I'm going to have pizza, and really the only question

for me as I look forward to the rest of the evening is how many slices of pizza am I going

to eat, right?

Like what is my MPA for tonight?

Maximum pizza allowance.

Now when I'm being semi-responsible, my MPA is four, right?

Maximum pizza allowance, four slices, but sometimes I feel a little bad when I eat four slices.

Not physically bad, but just guilty like, oh, I ate too many calories.

So I've been trying to keep it to three for the past couple weeks, and it's been difficult.

Because I leave the dining room table, which in this case is usually the kitchen island,

selling a little morose because I haven't eaten as much pizza as I want to eat.

How much pizza do I want to eat?

Probably between five and six slices, which seems excessive to me.

So I generally don't do it.

The question is, can I keep it to three?

I don't know.

...