S2 Ep45: Everything In My Life Is Financially Impossible

Dubland

HeadStuff Podcasts

News, Society & Culture, Comedy

5.0 • 569 Ratings

🗓️ 24 February 2021

⏱️ 54 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Straight into the action this week on Dubland with pie charts, right angles, pizza and the globally diminishing ability to be able to tell the time. St. Anthony is on the lookout for Suzanne's AirPods and PJ tells us about his waxy ears and burning "water" in a list of pains and grievances that Suzanne, the mother of three, wouldn't understand. PJ is going to get into a helicopter with a pilot who loves golf jumpers and is convinced PJ is someone other than PJ. Suzanne discovers micro-happiness and tells us about it by explaining her anger and making everyone furious in the process. She was, however, giddy with her McDonald's in bed and titillating pornographic Whatsapp chats with her pals. PJ's mortgage woes rear their head again while Suzanne talks about buys spare homes. There's a hero of the week and Suzanne doing some of PJ's life admin. There are golf bats, Bitcoin and loads more. It's Dubland, what do you expect? support the show at HeadStuff+ and get more content just for you lovely members! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Hear that? It's your big McDonald's hunger calling, because the Big Arch is back, and this time it's here to stay with juicy beef, cheddar cheese and that Big Arch sauce.
0:10.0	Hungry, you are now. Order delivery on the McDonald's app.
0:15.0	Serve from 11am, upcharges and fees apply to delivery orders. Subjects availability, price and participation may vary.
0:20.0	Idle money chills in your current account, parked in front of the telly,
0:24.8	wanting a snack, yet too lazy to move.
0:28.5	But thanks to Monzo, busy money got up early.
0:31.7	Automatically split your paycheck into pots,
0:34.6	rounded up your purchases into savings,
0:36.9	invested your interest into Ices.
0:38.8	Oh, and has already written itself a to-do list for tomorrow.
0:41.9	Monzo, the bank that gets your money moving.
0:45.0	UK residents aged 18 plus.
0:46.6	Monzo personal account required.
0:48.0	Capital at risk.
0:48.7	Tees and season fees may apply.
0:51.8	This show is part of the Headstuff Podcast Network.
0:56.9	The bonus material this week is...
1:00.0	Tiger Woods. You're talking about Tiger Woods.
1:02.0	Carrots.
1:02.7	Carrots and why you should buy them with a responsible adult.
1:06.3	Oh, and what you're doing this weekend.
1:07.7	And 10 meal Sunday, which is a thing.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from HeadStuff Podcasts, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of HeadStuff Podcasts and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.