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Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram

S2 Ep114: What Happens to Old Love When You Have New Intimate Needs? Ft Karamo Brown

Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram

LOVERS by shan

Sexuality, Society & Culture, Relationships, Health & Fitness

55.5K Ratings

🗓️ 9 April 2025

⏱️ 47 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Does a change in your intimate needs have to mean a change of heart? In this episode of Lovers Shan Boodram sits down with Karamo Brown, TV personality (Karama and Queer Eye), author, and culture expert, for a raw and revealing conversation about intimacy and growth. Karamo opens up about how his intimate needs evolved through his 20s, 30s, and 40s—both emotionally and in the bedroom. He shares how these changes led to the end of a past relationship, where his partner couldn’t accept his evolving needs without taking it personally.
Now, in a thriving new relationship, Karamo reveals how he’s learned to bring his partner along as he navigates these changes, fostering a deeper connection and understanding. This episode is packed with wisdom on embracing growth, improving communication, and honoring your needs without guilt.


Karamo Brown, Lovers and Friends Podcast, Lovers by Shan, Shan Boodram, intimacy in relationships, emotional intimacy, evolving needs in relationships, intimacy advice, relationship communication, breakups and growth, thriving relationships, intimacy in 20s 30s 40s, LGBTQ relationships, personal growth, gay relationship advice, sex and relationships

Thank You Karamo Brown
https://www.instagram.com/karamo
Learn About His TV Show: https://karamoshow.com/
Get His New Children’s Book: https://zandoprojects.com/books/i-am-okay-to-feel/

Thanks Arya for sponsoring this episode:
Arya is a service for couples that helps them break their sexual routine with the help of an intimacy concierge that serves up curated sexy scenes monthly to sign up or learn more go to
http://arya.fyi/shan


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Transcript

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0:00.0

If you can't handle my truth when it comes to my intimacy,

0:03.0

if you can't handle calm conversations about what I need

0:07.0

and me equally hearing what you need,

0:09.0

then we weren't supposed to be together.

0:11.0

This is a word that you just gave me

0:13.0

of talking about seasons of intimacy.

0:15.0

Define what that even means.

0:16.0

I think the problem in any relationship,

0:18.0

intimate relationship, is when people are afraid

0:20.0

to let the other person grow and change. I know you so much better than you know yourself that this is what you

0:25.8

want and this is who you are. If you have real intimacy, I'm going to be curious, is anything

0:30.1

changed? That's what I know now. I have never reflected on that relationship. Never. If I would

0:35.7

have felt like they were going to listen more and not

0:39.3

be afraid, then I think we could have probably saved it. I was in a space at first

0:43.8

where all touching was light and love. And I'm like, no, let's go here now. What changed?

0:52.3

Um, you walk this past often? If I was trying to get rid of my Let's go here now. What changed? Um.

0:57.2

Do you walk this past off then?

1:00.5

If I was trying to get rid of my, like, boy, my kids, I'd be like, y'all stay there.

1:01.1

I walk this.

1:03.6

Y'all stay there.

1:04.9

I'll be back.

1:10.6

Okay, so how this show works, it's really an educational moment for you take Center Stage as the teacher.

...

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