S16E4: Breaking the Second Date Curse

Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships

Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick

Relationships, Sexuality, Science, Social Sciences, Health & Fitness, Society & Culture

4.5 • 877 Ratings

🗓️ 8 March 2023

⏱️ 72 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Why is it so damn difficult to make it past the second date in today's world? We're chatting with Kevin about how it was so hard that he thought he had a second date curse – until he realized the pressure he was putting on himself. We discuss why we look at dating as an achievement, how to stop putting so much emphasis on milestones and metrics such as the number of dates you've been on, and how you can start to enjoy the process more of dating. Follow us @dateablepodcast. Check out our website for more content, virtual live show dates, and merch. Join the Sounding Board at https://www.dateablepodcast.com/soundingboard This episode is sponsored by: BetterHelp: Get 10% off your first month of online therapy at betterhelp.com/dateable with the code DATEABLE Blissy: Get 30% off silk pillows with the code DATEABLE at https://blissy.com/dateable Drizly: Download the Drizly app or go to Drizly.com and use promo code FAST5 for $5 off your first order. Dateable is part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more outstanding podcasts to subscribe to at frolic.media/podcasts WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE is available for pre-order now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Meeting People IRL Kickstarter - CLOSES August 31st and get $10 OFF now through then! Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-podcast/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi I'm U.S. Schu. And I'm Julie Kraftcheek.
0:03.2	We're active daters turned dating sociologists.
0:06.5	Here to dive into everything modern dating and relationships.
0:10.6	Welcome to the Datable Podcast.
0:13.0	Hi Datables,
0:15.0	Hi Datables,
0:18.0	welcome to another week and another episode of the Datable
0:21.0	Podcast.
0:22.0	We are back with so much more to talk about when it comes to
0:25.5	dating but today in particular we feel like this is a mindset a lot of people
0:29.8	have it's like you're cursed when it comes to dating. You know you were dealt with a bad hand. Why is it you getting cursed?
0:39.0	I think we've all been there at some point that you're just like why can't anything get past
0:44.4	whatever date is the one that's causing you challenges for me it was the third
0:48.8	date the first and second were pretty natural it felt like there was no issues having conversation, the date
0:55.9	talk, but I think the third date for me held importance because it seemed like that was the time
1:00.8	where people were making more of a decision, do I want to keep going with this or not
1:05.6	but as we talked to our listener today the second date was what was getting him so I think everyone that point, but we all have it or had it if we can get out of that mentality.
1:17.0	And it's so easy to say, why me? This is something I'm doing, I'm cursed. I'll never get in a relationship, I'll never get past this.
1:26.0	Or you can see this as this is just part of the process of dating.
1:30.0	This is what we're really going to talk about.
1:32.0	It's just a mindset shift.
1:34.1	If you want to believe that you've been cursed,
	...

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