Hey, it's Gregory Warner. This is rough translation. I used to love making New Year's resolutions.

As a kid I was a terrible nerd about it. Like, I'd write them out. I'd even put them in an envelope. I don't even think I ever begged my parents to let me stay up and watch fireworks, like my own kids do now.

I was just too excited about waking up early on January 1st to get started on my list of goals.

At some point I just dropped the whole resolution tradition, didn't do the list at all.

In part I think I just get tired of the sight of so many abandoned goals.

They haunted me with their undoneness. And so it was with some interest that I came across a phrase recently in a science journal,

Goal disengagement.

It's basically the opposite of setting new goals for yourself for the future.

Goal disengagement is letting go of old goals from the past that you will no

longer strive for and depressing as that may sound these researchers from

NYU were making the case that actually one thing that can help

you succeed in new goals or at least be happier and less stressed is to go through this

process letting go of old goals that no longer serve you.

Saying, you know what, this year, I'm not going to try to learn that new language.

I am not going to go low-carb, or letting go of bigger things as well.

When I asked subscribers on my sub-stack, what have you had to let go of?

Yeah, I mean, I'm not completely sure what I'm doing, but...

A few brave people responded, because it's not easy in a culture that reveres success and achievement

to talk about the ambitions you've abandoned. I guess I'm doing this, okay. of or the dreams you've had to discard?

I had a vision of what married life would be and it didn't turn out to be that way and so I had to...

But in all of your stories you did make clear what letting go of old goals has made possible for you now.

I think I've realized that I wanted to become a professor for many years to kind of feel security. I worked as a school crossing guard, which was something I never thought I would have the courage to do. I got to become part of a neighborhood so I have to say I am grateful.

...