Rewiring Emotions: From Humor to Honesty in Therapy

The Virtual Couch

Tony Overbay LMFT

Education, Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Self-improvement

5 • 643 Ratings

🗓️ 15 January 2024

⏱️ 50 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Tony takes inspiration from Carolyn Steber's article, "Is Everyone Out Here Lying To Their Therapist," https://www.bustle.com/wellness/lying-to-therapist (https://www.bustle.com/wellness/lying-to-therapist) using it as a muse (and explaining what a muse is) to explore the benefits and challenges of therapy from both the client's and therapist's viewpoints. He delves into primary and secondary emotions, highlighting how humor and anger often serve as secondary emotions. Tony also unpacks the origin of the "what's wrong with me" mindset, explaining how children internalize emotions, leading to a reliance on external validation in adulthood. The episode concludes with insightful discussions on neuroplasticity, implicit memory, and the significant benefits of being honest with your therapist.00:00 Introduction and Welcome00:41 Engaging with the Audience: Social Media and Live Q&A01:58 The Power of Muse and Self-Reflection03:45 Exploring the Article: Is Everyone Lying to Their Therapist?04:07 Understanding the Role of a Therapist06:12 The Science Behind Talk Therapy14:18 The Role of Humor in Therapy17:47 Understanding Primary and Secondary Emotions24:32 Understanding Secondary Emotions24:52 Exploring Anger and Humor as Secondary Emotions25:31 The Role of Childhood Experiences in Shaping Emotions26:38 The Impact of Humor as a Coping Mechanism28:27 The Power of Neuroplasticity and Implicit Memory29:23 The Influence of Environment on Emotional Tendencies30:04 The Role of Humor in Therapy Sessions30:31 The Importance of Honesty in Therapy32:02 Understanding the Role of Validation in Therapy37:54 The Power of Neuroplasticity in Changing Emotional Responses39:57 The Role of Therapists and Coaches in Emotional Growth40:08 Understanding the Importance of Comfort and Trust in Therapy44:04 The Journey of Self-Discovery and GrowthTo learn more about Tony's upcoming re-release of the Magnetic Marriage course, his Pathback Recovery course, and more, sign up for his newsletter through the link at https://linktr.ee/virtualcouchPlease follow Tony’s newest Instagram account for the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast https://www.instagram.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, everybody, and take a seat on the virtual couch.
0:38.8	Hey, everybody. Welcome to episode 409 of the virtual couch. Happy New Year. I'm your host, Tony Overbay. I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist and host of the Waking Up to Narcism podcast, Love ADHD, Murder on the Couch, Coast of the Mind, The Mirror, Me. And I have a very fun episode today. We're going to cover all kinds of things. But first, go sign up for the newsletter and go to
0:44.1	Tonyoverbay.com or it will be in the show notes. And let me just say that if you TikTok or YouTube
0:48.7	or Instagram, please go find me. My daughter, Sydney and I have been hosting live question and
0:54.1	answers on TikTok. And we've done five, Sidney, and I have been hosting live question and answers on TikTok,
0:55.6	and we've done five, I think, up to this point. We're posting one today on my YouTube channel,
1:01.4	and it is one of the funest things I think I do, and that is to be able to spend this last one
1:06.8	was almost an hour and a half with my 21-year-old daughter, Sid, and answer relationship
1:12.0	questions because there are times where I do feel like I can hang when it comes to questions,
1:16.8	but then I will get a lot of questions from people that are in their 20s.
1:22.0	And it turns out that they are slightly different than those in their 30s, 40s, 50s and above.
1:27.5	And it's so fun to get her take and then just the interaction.
1:30.8	On our last live, we had just a hair under 15,000 people stopped by with over 400 comments.
1:37.4	Sid and I are both open about our ADHD.
1:39.4	It is a superpower.
1:40.9	It is just a fun interaction.
1:42.5	I just enjoy so much about it. So if you go right now to my
1:45.6	virtual couch YouTube channel, hit that subscribe button and then watch that last one. I think we
1:50.0	really do cover everything. And more are coming and we'll be bringing the lives to YouTube and
1:54.5	Instagram soon as well. So today, this is a very fun one. And as I was preparing and jotting
2:00.2	down notes, this episode almost has a vibe of what
2:03.1	have we learned over the past year in therapy?
	...

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