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Today in Focus

Revisited: Having a baby with your best mate

Today in Focus

The Guardian

News, Daily News

4.65.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 December 2025

⏱️ 34 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Nicola Slawson on her decision to have a baby with her best friend Tom rather than a romantic partner. Help support our independent journalism at theguardian.com/infocus

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This is The Guardian.

0:06.0

Hi, it's Helen here. Today in Focus is taking a little Christmas break so that we can recharge

0:11.4

our batteries ready for 2026. And while we're off, we're replaying a few of our favourite episodes

0:17.2

of the year. And today is one that I still think about a lot because it really challenged

0:22.3

my assumptions on family, about friendship, about parenting and about platonic relationships.

0:28.1

And it also made me laugh a lot. I hope you enjoy it too.

0:33.7

Today, what happens when you have a baby with your best mate instead of a romantic partner?

0:40.3

Hi! It's a sunny day in Shrewsbury and a very cheery little girl with rosy cheeks and just a few front teeth is keen to see who's at the door.

1:01.6

Hello, he's this?

1:03.6

Hello, gorgeous girl.

1:05.0

She loves visitors.

1:07.1

Does she?

1:07.9

Yeah.

1:08.6

Hello.

1:09.4

She was just doing a poo though.

1:10.7

Oh really? Oh, really? This. Oh, man. She was just doing a poo though. Oh, really?

1:11.2

Yeah.

1:13.3

This is Nicholas Lawson, a journalist and writer, and her very sociable 11-month-old daughter.

1:19.9

Should we let them in?

1:21.9

Thanks for having us.

1:24.7

Oh, no worries.

1:24.9

Nicola recently went back to work, and Tom, the baby's dad, took over the shared parental leave.

...

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