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On Health

Rediscovering Intimacy and Pleasure with Emily Nagoski

On Health

Aviva Romm

Health & Fitness, Arts, Alternative Health, Medicine

4.81.4K Ratings

🗓️ 25 June 2024

⏱️ 71 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I’m so excited to share an encore interview with the brilliant, hilarious, and incredibly insightful Emily Nagoski, author of Come As You AreCome Together, and Burnout (co-written with her sister). Emily is a renowned sex educator who brings a blend of scientific rigor and relatable storytelling to the conversation about women's sexual health and pleasure. Get ready for a foxy (you’ll have to listen to hear why this is literally true!)conversation full of laughter, wisdom, and relatable experiences. Today we talk about her latest book: Come Together (she does come up the most perfect titles!). Note we talk about SEX and get real. So perhaps not an episode with littles in the car unless you want to do a lot of explaining while you listen. 

In this episode we dive deep into:

  • High Expectations and Reality Checks: Emily shares the unexpected challenges of writing Come As You Are and the personal journey that inspired Come Together. Discover how stress and exhaustion can impact desire, even for a sex educator.
  • The Emotional Floor Plan: Learn about the emotional floor plan concept that Emily developed to understand her journey from stress to pleasure. This framework is a game-changer for navigating intimacy in long-term relationships.
  • Say the Words: Emily and Aviva discuss the importance of desensitizing yourself to sexual language. Get ready to laugh and learn as they share exercises for getting comfortable talking about sex - starting with getting comfortable talking about body parts. 
  • The Patriarchy and Pleasure: Emily dives into the complex impact of the patriarchy on sexual relationships. Discover how societal norms and expectations shape our desires and how to break free from them.
  • Unleashing Your Inner Wild: Aviva and Emily explore how women can reconnect with their deep feminine energy and inner wise woman. Learn about the power of rewilding and embracing your authentic self.
  • Navigating Change: Practical tips for couples on how to navigate change and maintain a strong sexual connection. From creating safe conversations to understanding each other’s needs, this segment is packed with actionable advice.
  • The Four Questions: Emily shares four essential questions to help couples understand and improve their sexual relationship. These questions are a roadmap to deeper connection and pleasure.
  • The Power of Love: Emily’s profound realization about the impermanence of life and the importance of kindness, compassion, and play in relationships. Aviva reflects on her own 40-year marriage and the lessons she’s learned.

We hope this episode helps you feel seen, heard, and empowered. If you enjoy it - and On Health in general - please share this with a friend and leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform. Don’t forget to follow the podcast to be notified of new episodes on the regular.

Resources Mentioned:

  • Emily Nagoski’s books: Come As You AreCome Together, and Burnout (co-written with her sister).
  • Aviva Romm’s courses and blog: AvivaRomm.com

Looking for supplements for yourself and your family, including some of those I talk about in episodes? You can find those - and your 15% discount on every order here: avivaromm.com/supplements

Mentioned in this episode:

Looking for supplements for yourself and your family, including some of those I talk about in...

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

From the stuff your mother never told you to the stuff your doctor never

0:06.1

told you to the stuff your doctor never learned on health is what happens when a

0:10.4

midwife plus a Yale trained MD shares about all things women's health

0:14.8

from periods to menopause sex to reproductive health politics motherhood to

0:19.9

mental health join me for taboo busting conversations that

0:23.4

demystify and destigmatize our bodies, all while bridging the gap

0:27.6

between conventional medicine and wellness. Along the way, we'll be exploring

0:31.8

the science and wisdom of how our bodies work

0:34.0

What makes us well what gets in the way and how we can live our best lives on our terms

0:39.8

When it comes to women's health and well-being, there's nothing we won't talk about.

0:44.0

The new medicine for women is here.

0:46.0

I'm Dr. Aviva Rame.

0:48.0

Welcome to OnHealth. A couple of years back, I was joined by the wonderfully informative and clearly hilarious and fantastically able to sing author of Come as you are Emily Nagowski and today we are here for a new conversation. I should say

1:17.1

Emily is back and we're gonna discuss among other things her new Come Together, the woman clearly has like the

1:25.5

corner on book titles, come as you are, come together. I was pretty proud of

1:29.7

come together when I thought of that. It's really good. And so we're going to talk about the changes and

1:33.9

challenges that arise in the lives of couples in long-term relationships based not just

1:39.7

on her vast research and clinical experience, but her own sex life and relationship and since

1:45.1

I've been in a marriage for 40 years and it's not fair to just let this be one-sided come

1:49.6

together right we're gonna dish so sit back and relax or do whatever you're doing and enjoy.

1:56.7

And I know you're gonna walk away with a whole lot of smiles, I hope and some really

2:02.4

good new information that you can take back home and maybe

...

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