Welcome to Roll, Let's Roll!

Never get their control!

They've got their money, but we've got our soul.

Let's roll, let's roll, never get their control.

It's ain't got their money, but we've got our soul.

Welcome to Redact to Tonight.

This is the show where Americans in America covering American news are called foreign agents.

So, well, just another humdrum week here in America.

Just another coup attempt at the Capitol building

that got four people killed and resulted in a shirtless man

with horns presiding over the Senate.

Is this how you saw Trump's shit show ending?

Because if I'm honest with myself,

I did have a fever dream on his inauguration day

that looked a lot like that.

But then again, could that guy possibly be worse than Mitch McConnell?

I find that hard to believe.

Anyway, we'll get more, we'll get to more discussion of the whole

insurrection slash terrorist attacks slash white supremacist amusement park at the Capitol in the second half of the show.

But let's begin with a different yet equally crucial story.

I just want to start off by saying, thank the lords for America's horrific, disgusting crime against humanity prison system.

All right!

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