Today we have Emily, she is 44, from Phoenix, AZ and took her last drink on March 10th, 2019

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[02:34] Paul's thoughts:

 

Paul doesn't make many promises on this podcast but feels he can 100% positively tell us that we will never regret not drinking.  You won't regret the extra $20 you save; the planet won't regret the gallons of water not used after "breaking the seal" or the trash drinking creates. Your family will never regret you not drinking. Your pets, your plants, your job, your community. Your hobbies, and your goals as well as any one of the 70 trillion cells in your body will not regret you not drinking.

 

It takes bravery and courage to take this path but listeners, you will not regret ditching the booze. You can do this.

 

 

[08:30] Kris introduces Emily:

 

Emily has been sober for almost 4 years. She lives in Phoenix AZ with her husband, two daughters and two cats. She currently works in music education and loves to play music, paddleboard, and listening to podcasts.

 

Emily had little exposure to alcohol growing up. Her father was a recovering alcoholic, which wasn't talked about much. She took her first drink at the age of 19 at an Army officer training program event. She was very nervous and insecure in new social settings so accepted the offer to drink and ended up blacking out.

She was excited to fit in but had a huge sense of shame because she didn't remember what happened.

 

Drinking was a problem for Emily right from the start. It was never just one she always binge drank. Throughout college and her career, she was able to mostly uphold her dual life – had it all together but on the inside was struggling with fears of not fitting in and fears of abandonment.

 

Emily's husband was also in the military and was deployed frequently. She used alcohol to self soothe when she felt isolated. They were moving around a lot which gave Emily a chance to start over every time. She didn't have to worry about who she alienated or upset with her drinking and just moved to the next town. 

 

Emily reconnected with her father when one of their moves took them to the area where he lived. She enjoyed the opportunity they had to get to know one another and spend time together. When her father died unexpectedly, her drinking ramped up again. 

 

Over the last few years of her drinking, she ended up resigning from her job and took a work from home position. She found herself drinking more and it was affecting all of her relationships. Emily decided to change her relationship with alcohol after a painful experience that happened with her kids. Within a few days of the event, she walked into her first AA meeting and that was her quit date.

 

Emily started with AA and an IOP program. She attended a lot of meetings and found a sponsor that helped her learn how to stop punishing herself and stop worrying about being abandoned. Being willing to do what her sponsor suggested helped her recovery. She was able to start playing music again and has started being a sponsor herself.

 

[51:20] Kris' outro:

 

One of the beautiful things about recovery is finding parts of ourselves that we thought we lost.  Emily has reconnected with her love for music and her song "Am I Alright?" as the outro today.

 

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Remember, we took the elevator down, but we've got to take the stairs back up

You can do this

I love you guys