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Flying Free

Raising Resilient Kids Even if Your Co-parent Is Destructive [233]

Flying Free

Natalie Hoffman

Emotional, Narcissism, Christianity, Abuse, Religion & Spirituality, Spiritual, Christian, Self-improvement, Education, Divorce, Marriage

51K Ratings

🗓️ 25 July 2023

⏱️ 37 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Jessica Nagy is joining us today to talk about how to raise children to be resilient, even when their dad is destructive. No matter if your kids are spending time alone with their dad at his house because you are separated or divorced or if they are spending time with their dad while you are present, there is a lot of trauma that comes with having an emotionally abusive dad, and we as moms need to know how to help our kids become resilient in the face of this trauma.


In this episode, you will learn about co-regulation (you can regulate yourself right alongside your kids!), practical techniques to help your kids regulate their emotions and develop resilience, find out how to download a free PDF with even more resources, and more. If you are a mother who is also a survivor of emotional abuse, this episode is just for you.


Key Points From This Episode:

  • The story behind Mosaic Motherhood, Jessica’s website.
  • Why kids actually aren’t as resilient as we may trick ourselves to believe they are.
  • The reason why you probably won’t be able to get full custody of your kids (and how you can use your time and resources to prepare them for going over to their dad’s instead!)
  • How to co-regulate and why it’s so important for your kids AND for you.
  • Why healing ourselves and modeling healing work can be life-changing for your children.
  • Why community is so vital for our families.
  • Some good news: you only have to be a good enough parent 50% of the time (woot woot!)

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

Related Resources:

  • Check out Jessica’s website, Mosaic Motherhood.
  • Get her free PDF download: “Four Keys to Raising Resilient Children.”
  • If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com
  • I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list at https://flyingfreesisterhood.com/free-download
  • You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com
  • And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher at https://joinflyinghigher.com

Jessica Nagy is a mom of two, a survivor, a Trauma Support Specialist, and an NLP Master Coach. Her passion is helping moms to build community and empower their children to navigate their destructive family systems. Jessica has been building communities for over twenty years across all of North America, in English and in Spanish. Her most recent project is Mosaic Motherhood, a community of warrior moms who are navigating co-parenting with a destructive individual.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hi, this is Natalie Hoffman of Flying Free Now.com and you're listening to the

0:09.3

Flying Free Podcast, a support resource for Women of faith, looking for hope and healing from hidden

0:16.4

emotional and spiritual abuse. Welcome to episode 233 of the Flying Free Podcast. Today we have a special guest. Her name is

0:31.3

Jessica Nagy and she is a trauma support specialist, an NLP master coach, and the founder of Mosaic motherhood.

0:41.0

And today she's here to talk to us about how to raise resilient kids, even if your co-parent is destructive. So welcome,

0:50.0

Jessica. Thanks Natalie, I'm happy to be here. Okay Okay why don't we start by having you tell us about your story and why you started Mosaic motherhood?

1:00.0

So a few years ago I was sitting in church one Sunday and the rows were packed and up on the

1:09.3

screen a father was swinging his little boy around like Superman and I remember thinking

1:16.1

I wish I had that I wish my kids had that I was surrounded by people, tears streaming down my face, no one offered me a tissue, or even bothered to ask if I was okay.

1:30.0

Wow.

1:31.0

I was, again, surrounded by people but the loneliest I had ever been.

1:37.0

And fast forward a few months I remember imagining myself on the freeway, pressing my foot against the gas,

1:45.2

lifting my hands off the wheel, and bracing for impact.

1:49.7

I fantasized about driving my car off the road,

1:52.6

but there were three reasons I didn't.

1:54.7

An eight month old boy, a three year old girl,

1:57.2

and someone I could call on to drive.

1:59.6

And so that portion of my story and those reasons why I didn't make a poor choice,

2:10.8

what catapulted me towards getting safe and getting healthy and stronger.

2:16.0

And I don't know that I ever would have done it just for myself.

2:20.0

So I can say with a lot of conviction that my children saved my life and when I finally decided to separate and ultimately divorce I decided it was my turn to save theirs.

2:32.0

But there weren't a lot of resources available for my kids.

...

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