We began to think a little about family life, Christian family life on yesterday's things unseen. I've often noticed that when

young couples are beginning to establish their family and raise their children

for the Lord Jesus, they're very likely to get some Christian books on the subject.

I don't know what your reaction will be to what I'm about to say,

but I think we do need to be dis-sounding about books on how we should raise our family.

The very best of them will do as good. But the very best help you're likely to be able to find is not from books, but from parents you

respect in your church family, not least older parents who have seen the fruit of

the way in which they've raised their children for Christ. I suspect the best of them will not provide

you with a formula, although that's what we sometimes want, isn't it? Just tell me what to do to

have a good family and I'll do it. But older wiser

parents will share with you what they've found helpful, where they made mistakes, what

they've seen and learned about applying biblical principles to their unique family life and to each of their unique children.

And most of all they will focus on what you can never get from a book, the importance of the atmosphere of love.

It used to be said that young people didn't fully become themselves until they were well

into their 20s. And now it's possible

that that's even stretched a bit. I know if you're in your late teens or early 20s you

maybe don't want to hear that and maybe you don't even agree with it. But I think you will

agree with this, that parents don't see the long-term effects of their family life or the way they have

raised their children until the children have actually grown up.

And that's one reason why I'd be cautious about listening to a child-rearing guru whose children are still children.

I remember asking about a lady who was speaking at a Christian conference and

bringing up children because even although I hadn't heard her speak I had the impression that she wasn't

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