4.8 • 11K Ratings
🗓️ 5 January 2018
⏱️ 86 minutes
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0:00.0 | This episode of the DTFH is brought to you by Squarespace.com. |
0:04.3 | Head to Squarespace.com and when you're ready to launch, use Africa Duncan to get 10% off your website or domain. |
0:12.0 | Hello, my dearest listener, and thank you for steering the skiff of your mind into the glowing phosphorescent waters of the lagoon that is the Duncan Trustle Family Hour Podcast. |
0:26.0 | Look, we all know that it's only a matter of time before the San Andreas fault cracks open and robotic superintelligent spiders come skittering across California, blasting fiery beams of flesh disintegrating light into anyone who crosses their paths. |
0:45.0 | We know that it's only a matter of time before somewhere in some laboratory at Google, a swarm of nanobots escapes and runs amuck through our sweet planet Earth, reconfiguring us at the atomic level and transforming us from human beings into quivering cubes of multi-eye-balled screaming bits of plasmatic goo. |
1:09.0 | And before this happens, many of us are probably going to get arrested and fisted by Jeff Sessions in his own personal deluxe private prison cell where he shows up from time to time when he needs to blow off steam from a hard day of making plants illegal and just relax. |
1:27.0 | And somebody like Jeff Sessions, all you've got to do is spend a few seconds looking at any picture of him to know that that guy has got a leather bodysuit that he keeps in a secret closet in his office in Washington. |
1:42.0 | And at the end of the day, he zips that thing on, squeezes a butt plug underneath his desk and a set of stairs opens up in the wall which he descends in there he has a torture room filled with imprisoned farmers who he fists all night long while whispering strange southern sayings in their ears. |
2:09.0 | Oh, you know, sometimes when the bird egg cracks the birdie flies, but sometimes when the cracks stay shut, the birdie dies. |
2:19.0 | These people hate mother earth friends and they're doing everything they can to keep us sick, but the good news is this existing in this world as a kind of reflection to the Jeff Sessions and Trumps and all the other weird doughy men out there just want to kick us in the fucking heart. |
2:38.0 | The fucking heart chakra until we turn into pillars of calloused stone there exists messengers of love and light and teachers who are there for us whenever we're ready to make the descent from the prison cell of the mind where we fist ourselves every single day into the sweet chambers of the heart. |
3:02.0 | Today's guest is one of these people whether he'll admit to it or not. He runs the Love Server Member Foundation which puts on the meditation retreats that I go to twice a year and he's a really dear friend of mine and also a great teacher of mine. |
3:19.0 | So I really enjoyed this conversation. I'm excited to share it with you. We're going to jump right into it, but first some quick business. |
3:28.0 | Today's episode of the DTFH is brought to you by the web gurus over at square space dot com head over to square space dot com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use offer code Duncan to save 10% of your first purchase of a website or a domain. |
3:47.0 | Now I don't want to get all dark and forensic files in the middle of a square space commercial here, but I did just read that in the tropics somebody hired a charlatan web designer. |
4:00.0 | There's a lot of great web designers out there. Some of you are great web designers, but you guys are pretty expensive and you deserve to be paid a lot because you've spent years honing the craft and the technical skills involved in making a website. |
4:14.0 | But there's also a lot of people out there who claim to be web designers and one of these people was Roberto Tamar Lenore who lived in a small island in the tropics. |
4:26.0 | He was putting up signs that he could build websites for people and I guess somebody hired him and wasn't pleased with the work that he did. |
4:35.0 | And so one afternoon he broke into the guy's house, dragged him out of the house. I think he like injected him with some kind of sedative or tranquilizer, dragged him out of the house into a into the jungle and took him and did this. |
4:54.0 | I don't know if you ever heard of this thing that these charlatan web designers will do to their disgruntled customers who want their money back, but it's called canoeing and basically they take two canoes, they fill them up with meat and honey and sugar. |
5:09.0 | They cut holes in the sides and they take their disgruntled customers and they put them in the canoes and they chain the canoes together. |
5:19.0 | They put their arms sticking out the sides and then their disgruntled customers are gradually dissolved and eaten by maggots and bugs and rats that climb in through the armholes because they're drawn by the smell of the prisoner's fear diaria and the sugar and the honey. |
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