Welcome to another episode of Dirty Motherpucker.

I'm Anna White House, the founder of Motherpucker, and I'm joined by my filthy little minkslop-mit.

Polly Hazelwood. Oh, right. There it is. I've had quite a week this week. You know how we always preface this with the fact that we're actually not that filthy and we're actually really quite clean. I'm sort of semi-vegan, I'd say. Semi-vegan? I think so. Like, I don't... If there's a sausage, I'll have it.

If there's a Savaloi on the platter, I won't say no, but I won't actively seek out...

The sausage?

That's not what I thought about you, Anna.

I thought you're always looking for a bit of sausage.

I was always actively seeking out the sausage.

Always actively seeking out the porcine goods.

I tell you what, I love a Frankfurter.

God, you, last week, the people who commented saying

they were sort of vomiting in their mouth hearing you talk about your love of a crab stick.

It's like between a crab stick and a Frankfurter,

I've realised my children filthy than I am. So I'll chat, this is verbatim, at the kitchen table this week. They were joking, and I was saying, do you want to drink? And my eldest was like, yes, I want bum juice. Bum juice? Yeah, and I was like, oh, okay. I've got right got ribena and orange squash then my youngest piped up

she just went at the top of her lungs

the door was open to the back of our house so obviously all the neighbors could hear she goes

i want penis juice

what kind of kids are you putting it?

I don't know where this came from but they're at that age where bums and penises and vulvers are all like centre stage, you know, it's like the full-on, like, genitalia cocktail. Everything's funny. Everything's funny. Hey, you and I haven't left that era. We're still laughing at penises now. I know, small ones, big ones, some size of your head. Anyway, I'm looking at her, and she could see, I'm the only way to describe that Paul is aghast.

She just then thought, right, got her hair.

Penus juice!

It hit such a crescendo.

...