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Welcome to R slash Am I the Butthole, where O.P. has a scumbag, deadbeat sister.

Am I the butthole for not being excited my sister is having a new baby when I still have custody of her first child? My sister Val is an alcoholic, or was an alcoholic,

I don't know the terminology. She's been on and off since she was 18. Her drinking made her

neglectful parents. I won't go into it, but eventually

social services stepped in and I ended up fostering my nephew, Danny, who was six at the time.

When we took custody, Val made almost no effort to see Danny. She missed scheduled visits,

even in the brief period she was clean after being sent to rehab. Danny grew

very resentful, and when she did stick to visits, he would refuse to speak to her, which would

drive Val into another bender slash spiral slash relapse. After two years of fostering, my husband

and I were given full legal guardianship, which Val voluntarily gave us.

Danny is now 11, and Val isn't in his life, which he says is what he wants.

Val's been sober for two years, and only ever asks how Danny is when she speaks to me.

She makes no effort to contact him. I've never really said much to her

about it because Danny's a happy kid, and I think we're both good parents to him. And I don't

want Val to start contacting him out of obligation, which ends up hurting him. She's basically

just an uninvolved aunt to him. But earlier this week, Val announced on a family group call

that she's pregnant, and I couldn't even fake being pleased. My stomach just dropped.

She's over there grinning, talking about a nursery, while next door to me is the bedroom of the kid she discarded.

It's one thing to hold your hands up and say you're not capable of being a mother.

...