Puddles in the morning, puddles in the evening, puddles in the afternoon, I'm a puddle boy and she's a puddle girl. Puddles podcasting, starting real soon.

Hey, welcome to Puddles with Andrew Colin, aka Drydick, aka Poo Pans, aka Ticklecock, aka garbage phase, aka Mice, aka ATC, aka aka.

Those are all nicknames I've given myself over the last three weeks.

You need better self-esteem.

I think it shows a lot of self-esteem to talk about my faults right up top. You know what you're getting into.

That's true, but I feel like identifying yourself as pooping.

Yeah, you know how that came about? I got poop on my hands. That would have been my guess.

When I was in high school, there was this kid and he was like, I don't know, he was, I guess, a cool kid, but he wasn't that cool.

He was cool among like eight other guys who had the same idea of cool and they were just like, where are the cool ones?

So he was the coolest of the non-cool kids.

It wasn't that they were non-cool. It's just that they had like an alternative definition to where they were like, we got the haircuts and we're cool.

And so there is this kid, they were like, his name was Joe and they were like, we call him period fucker.

You know why? And then I'm like talking like a teamster and has like, why do you call him period-fugging?

Because he fucked a chick on a period.

On his period. This is a very just like progressive gender.

It's fluid. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, in the early arts, when just everybody was just like, aww.

It is fun when a nickname is just right on the point.

Yeah, it's like so, it was so on the notes that I was like, why would you even?

You didn't, if you hadn't explained it, I would have been like, I get it.

Well, there's something like, well, first of all, I wish it was like, I wish it was like, when he has sex, he dresses up in Victorian job.

Yeah, it's got to be, what period, the blue period, dresses in blue face and fucks of Van Gogh.

...