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You're built to win it. Welcome to snoozecast, the podcast designed to help you fall asleep. Find us at snoozecast.com and if you enjoy our show, please share us with a friend. If you'd like to receive an email once a week with upcoming episodes, subscribe to the snooze letter at snoozecast.com. This episode is brought to you by Wild Giddiness. Tonight, we shall read the next part of Pride and Prejudice written by Jane Austen. Our Friday rotation is capped at four series now so that each episode will only be one month out from the next of a particular story. If you'd like to listen to this series or any of our others in order, please go to snoozecast.com slash series.

In the last episode, Elizabeth has finished reading Darcy's letter and is considering it over and over again in her mind.

As she considers, she starts to have a very different view of what has transpired.

Let's get cozy. Close your eyes. Relax your body into the softness of your bed. Now take a few deep breaths. Elizabeth came to the part of the letter in which her family were mentioned in terms of such mortifying yet merited reproach, her sense of shame was severe. the justice of the charge struck her too forcibly for denial, and the circumstances to which he particularly alluded as having passed at the Netherfield Ball, and as confirming all his first disaprovation, could not have made a stronger impression on his mind than on hers. The complement to herself and her sister were not unfelt. It soothed, but it could not console her for the contempt which had thus been self-attracted by the rest of her family. And as she considered that Jane's disappointment had in fact been the work of her nearest relations, and reflected how materially the credit of both must be hurt by such impropriety of conduct, she felt depressed beyond anything she had ever known before. After wandering along the lane for two hours, giving way to every variety of thought, reconsidering events, determining probabilities, and reconciling herself, as well as she could, to a change so sudden and so important, fatigue, and a recollection of her long absence made her at length return home. And she entered the house with the wish of appearing cheerful as usual, and the resolution of repressing such reflections as must make her unfit for conversation. She was immediately told that the two gentlemen from Rosings had each called during her absence. Mr. Darcy, only for a few minutes, to take leave, but that Colonel Fitzwilliam had been sitting with them at least an hour, hoping for her return, and almost resolving to walk after her till she could be found. Elizabeth could but just affect concern in missing him. She really rejoiced at it. Colonel Fitzwilliam was no longer an object. She could think only of her letter. Chapter 37 The two gentlemen left Rosings the next morning. Mr. Collins having been waiting near the lodges to make them his parting obeisance was able to bring home the pleasing intelligence of their appearing in very good health, and in as tolerable spirits as could be expected, after the melancholy scene so lately gone through at Rosings. To Rosings he then hastened, to console Lady Catherine and her daughter, and on his return brought back, with great satisfaction, a message from her ladyship, importing that she felt herself so dull as to make her very desirous of having them all to dine with her. Elizabeth could not see Lady Catherine without recollecting that, had she chosen it, she might be this time, have been presented to her as her future niece, nor could she think, without a smile, of what her Lady-ship's indignation would have been. What would she have said? How would she have behaved? Were questions with which she amused herself? Their first subject was the diminution of the Rosings party. I assure you, I feel it exceedingly," said Lady Catherine, I believe no one feels the loss of friends so much as I do. But I am particularly attached to these young men and know them to be so much attached to me. They were excessively sorry to go, but so they always are. The dear Colonel rallied his spirits tolerably till just at last, but Darcy seemed to feel it most acutely more, I think, than last year. His attachment to rosings certainly increases. Mr. Collins had a compliment and an illusion to throw in here which were kindly smiled on by the mother and daughter. The lady Catherine observed, after dinner, that Miss Bennett seemed out of spirits, and immediately accounting for it herself by supposing that she did not like to go home again so soon, she added. But if that is the case, you must write to your mother and beg that you may stay a little longer. Mrs. Collins will be very glad of your company, I am sure. I am much obliged to your leadership for your kind invitation, reply to Elizabeth, but it is not in my power to accept it. I must be in town next Saturday. Why? At that rate, you will have been here only six weeks. I expected you to stay two months. I told Mrs. Collins so before you came. There can be no occasion for your going so soon. Mrs. Bennett could certainly spare you for another fortnight. But my father cannot. He wrote last week to hurry my return. Oh, your father of course may spare you. If your mother can, daughters are never of so much consequence to a father. And if you will stay another month complete, it will be in my power to take one of you as far as London, for I am going there early in June for a week, and as Dawson does not object to the barouche box. There will be very good room for one of you, and indeed, if the weather should happen to be cool, I should not object to taking you both as you are neither of you large. You are all kindness, Madame, but I believe we must abide by our original plan. Lady Catherine seemed resigned. Mrs. Collins, you must send a servant with them. You know I always speak of my mind, and I cannot bear the idea of two young women traveling post by themselves. It is highly improper. You must contrive to send somebody. I have the greatest dislike in the world to that sort of thing. Young women should always be properly guarded and attended, according to their situation in life. When my niece, Georgiana, went to Ramsgate last summer, I made a point of her having two men's servants go with her. Miss Darcy, the daughter of Mr. Darcy, of Pemberley, and Lady Anne, could not have appeared with propriety in a different manner. I am excessively attentive to all those things. You must send John with the young ladies, Mrs. Collins. I am glad it occurred to me to mention it, for it would really be discreditable to you to let them go alone. My uncle is to send a servant for us. Oh, your uncle! He keeps a man servant, does he? I'm very glad you have somebody who thinks of these things. Where shall you change horses? Oh, Bromley, of course. If you mention my name at the bell, you will be attended to." Lady Catherine had many other questions to ask, respecting their journey, and as she did not answer them all herself, attention was necessary, which Elizabeth believed to be lucky for her, or, with a mind so occupied, she might have forgotten where she was. Reflection must be reserved for solitary hours, whenever she was alone. She gave way to it as the greatest relief, and not a day went by without a solitary walk, in which she might indulge in all the delight of unpleasant recollections. Mr. Darcy's letter, she was in a fair way of soon knowing by heart. She studied every sentence, and her feelings towards its writer were at times widely different. When she remembered the style of his address, she was still full of indignation. But when she considered how unjustly she had condemned and upgraded him, her anger was turned against herself and his disappointed feelings became the object of compassion. His This attachment excited gratitude, his general character, respect, but she could not approve him nor could she for a moment repent her refusal or feel the slightest inclination ever to see him again. In her own past behavior, there was a constant source of vexation and regret. And in the unhappy defects of her family, a subject of yet heavier chagrin, they were hopeless of remedy. Her father, contented with laughing at them, would never exert himself to restrain the wild giddiness of his youngest daughters. And her mother, with manners so far from right herself, was entirely insensible of the evil. Elizabeth had frequently united with Jane in an endeavor to check the imprudence of Catherine and Lydia. But while they were supported by their mother's indulgence, what chance could there be of improvement? Catherine, weak spirited, irritable, and completely under Lydia's guidance, had been always affronted by their advice. And Lydia, self-willed and careless, would scarcely give them a hearing. They were ignorant, idle, and vain. While there was an officer in Mary-Tinn, they would flirt with him, and while Maryton was within a walk of longborn, they would be going there forever. Anxiety on Jane's behalf was another prevailing concern, and Mr. Darcy's explanation, by restoring Bingley to all her former good opinion, hide in the sense of what Jane had lost. His affection was proved to have been sincere, and his conduct cleared of all blame, unless any could attach to the implicitness of his confidence in his friend. How grievous then was the thought that of a situation so desirable in every respect, so replete with advantage, so promising for happiness. Jane had been deprived by the folly and in decorum of her own family. When to these recollections was added the development of Wickham's character, it may be easily believed that the happy spirits which had seldom been depressed before were now so much affected as to make it almost impossible for her to appear tolerably cheerful. Their engagements at Rosings were as frequent during the last week of her stay as they had been at first. The very last evening was spent there, and her leadership again inquired minutely into the particulars of their journey, gave them directions as to the best method of packing, and was so urgent on the necessity of placing gowns in the only right way that Mariah thought herself obliged on her return to undo all the work of the morning and pack her trunk afresh. When they parted, Lady Catherine, with great condescension, wished them a good journey, invited them to come to Hunsford again next year, and Mr. Burg exerted herself so far as to Kurtzzi and held out her hand to both. on Saturday morning, Elizabeth and Mr. Collins met for breakfast a few minutes before the others appeared, and he took the opportunity of paying the parting civilities which he deemed indispensibly necessary. I know not, Miss Elizabeth," said he. Where their Mrs. Collins has yet expressed her sense of your kindness in coming to us, but I am very certain you will not leave the house without receiving her thanks for it. The favor of your company has been much felt, I assure you. We know how little there is to tempt anyone to our humble abode. Our plain manner of living, our small rooms and few domestics, and the little we see of the world must make Han's verdict extremely dull to a young lady like yourself. But I hope you will believe us grateful for the condescension, and that we have done everything in our power to prevent your spending your time unpleasantly. Elizabeth was eager with her thanks and assurances of happiness. at had spent six weeks with great enjoyment, and the pleasure of being with Charlotte, and the kind attentions she had received must make her feel thee obliged. Mr. Collins was gratified, and with a more smiling solemnity replied, It gives me great pleasure to hear that you have passed your time not disagreeably. We have certainly done our best, and most fortunately, having it in our power to introduce you to very superior society, and from our connection with rosings. The frequent means of varying the humble home scene, I think we may flatter ourselves that your Hunsford visit cannot have been entirely irksome. Our situation with regard to Lady Catherine's family is indeed the sort of extraordinary advantage and blessing which few can boast. You see on what a footing we are. You see how continually we are engaged there. In truth, I must acknowledge that, with all the disadvantages of this humble personage, I should not think anyone abiding in it an object of compassion while they are sharers of our intimacy at rosings. Words were insufficient for the elevation of his feelings, and he was obliged to walk around the room while Elizabeth tried to unite civility and truth in a few short sentences. You may, in fact, carry a very favorable report of us into heart for sure. My dear cousin, I flatter myself, that at least you will be able to do so. Lady Catherine's great attentions to Mrs. Collins, you have been a daily witness of. And altogether I trust it does not appear that your friend has drawn an unfortunate, but on this point it will be as well to be silent. Only let me assure you, my dear Miss Elizabeth, that I can from my heart most cordially wish you equal Felicity in marriage. My dear Charlotte and I have but one mind and one way of thinking. There is in everything a most remarkable resemblance of character and ideas between us. We seem to have been designed for each other. Elizabeth could safely say that it was a great happiness where that was the case, and with equal sincerity could add that she firmly believed and rejoiced in his most domestic comforts. She was not sorry, however, to have the recital of them interrupted by the lady from whom they sprang. Poor Charlotte, it was melancholy to leave her to such society, but she had chosen it with her eyes open, and though evidently regretting that her visitors were to go, she did not seem to ask for compassion. Her home and her housekeeping, her parish and her poultry, and all their dependent concerns had not yet lost their charms. At length the carriage arrived, the trunks were fastened on. The parcels placed within, and it was pronounced to be ready. After an affectionate parting between the friends, Elizabeth was attended to the carriage by Mr. Collins, and as they walked down the garden, he was commissioning her with his best respects to all her family. Not forgetting his thanks for the kindness he had received at Longborn in the winter, and his compliments to Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, though unknown. He then handed her in. Mariah followed, and the door was on the point of being closed when he suddenly reminded them with some consternation that They had hitherto forgotten to leave any message for the ladies at rosings. But he added, you will of course wish to have your humble respects delivered to them with your grateful thanks for their kindness to you while you have been here. Elizabeth made no objection. The door was then allowed to be shot, and the carriage drove off. Good gracious, cried Mariah, after a few minutes silence. It seems but a day or two since we first came, and yet how many things have happened? A great many indeed said her companion with a sigh. We have dined nine times at rosings, besides drinking tea there twice. How much I shall have to tell?" Elizabeth added privately, and how much I shall have to conceal. Their journey was performed without much conversation, or any alarm, and within four hours of their leaving Hunsford, they reached Mr. Gardiner's house where they were to remain a few days. Jane looked well and Elizabeth had little opportunity of studying her spirits amidst the varying engagements which the kindness of her aunt had reserved for them. But Jane was to go home with her, and at Longborn there would be leisure enough for observation. It was not without an effort, meanwhile, that she could wait even for Longborn before she told her sister of Mr. Darcy's proposals. To know that she had the power of revealing what would so exceedingly astonished Jane, and must, at the same time, so highly gratify whatever of her own vanity she had not yet been able to reason away, with such a temptation to openness as nothing could have conquered, but the state of indecision in which she remained as to the extent of what she could communicate. And her fear, if she once entered on the subject of being hurried into repeating something of Bingley which might only grieve her sister further. CHAPTER 39 It was the second week in May, in which the three young ladies set out together from Grace church street for the town in Hertfordshire. And as they drew near the appointed inn where Mr. Bennett's carriage was to meet them, they quickly perceived in token of the coachman's punctuality, both kitty and Lydia, looking out of a dining room upstairs. These two girls had been above an hour in the place, happily employed in visiting an opposite millenor watching the Sentinel on guard, and dressing a salad and cucumber. After welcoming their sisters, they triumphantly displayed a table set out with such cold meat as an in-later, usually affords. Exclaiming is not this nice, is not this an agreeable surprise. And we meant to treat you all, added Lydia. But you must lend us the money, for we have just spent ours at the shop out there." Then, showing her purchase as, look here, I have bought this bonnet. I do not think it's very pretty, but I thought I might as well buy it as not. I shall put it into pieces as soon as we get home and see if I can make it up any better. And when her sister's abused it as ugly, she added, with perfect, unconcerned, oh, but there were two or three much uglier in the shop. And when I have bought some prettier colored satin to trim it fresh, I think it will be very tolerable. Besides, it will not much signify what one wears this summer, after the hurt for sure have left Meriton, and they are going in a fortnight. Are they indeed, Critalisabeth, with the greatest satisfaction? They are going to be encamped near Brighton, and I do so want Papah to take us all there for the summer. It would be such a delicious scheme, and I dare say would hardly cost anything at all.

Mama would like to go too of all things.

Only think what a miserable summer else we shall have.

Yes, Thought Elizabeth, that would be a delightful scheme indeed, and completely do for us at once, could heaven, brighten, and a whole campful of soldiers to us, who have been overset already by one poor regimen of militia and the monthly

balls of Meriton. you you