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Hello and welcome to the slight political gab Fest for March 15th, 2013, the gigantic, delicious, sugary drink edition.

I am David Plotz, the editor of Slate.

To my right is Slate's chief political correspondent Jean Dickerson.

Bonjour, Jean.

Bonjour, David.

Why French? You should have picked Italian today, Jean. Bonjour, David. Why French?

You should have picked Italian today, I think.

Or Latin.

Bonjour, no.

And from Vatican City, where she has just been named the first Jewish and female Pope.

God save us all.

Habemus Mama is Slate's senior editor, Emily Bazelon. Emily, what were your papal name be? Oh. I think you want to pick Mary. My sons last night were suggesting names like, you know, Hank Aaron and Willie Mays. Those were their ideas. What do you think? But for you, what are you going to pick? Why not? I could be Hank Aaron, Pope, Hank Aaron. I guess I could pick. Suppose if they're letting in a Jewish female Pope, they're probably going to not make you use a saint's name for your. So, yeah, maybe. Yeah. I still. What would you be, John? You could, you know, one among us who could be Pope. You know, this is going to, but

it would probably be St. Francis, who's mom's favorite, St. Francis of Assisi loved, I mean,

among, he loved the poor, but he also loved birds. And mom loved St. Francis of Assisi. So we have

this, growing up, I had this really ugly piece of sort of quasi-modern art that was of St. Francis. So it probably would have been St. Francis. Is that why you love Twitter so much because St. Francis loved Bird? No, but it is why I actually love birds. Not because of St. Francis, but because of Mom. It's a weird, it's a strange little known part of,

I mean, I don't mean I'm a real bird watcher except out of the window of my house. So I'm lazy

...