I regret to put your middle to the test pile

I regret to inform the rest now I regret to inform the listeners this week

and I'm really sorry about it because I know everyone was excited

but our special guest this week will not be joining us.

I had hyped it up, you know.

I saw Elise, Whitaker, the inventor of two-ply bacon.

I was excited about it to talk to him about his invention.

And then I realised what two-ply bacon was, was just two bits of bacon that are half-cooked

because they're back on back.

Hmm.

I mean, that's a little reductive, but, you know, there's a lot of, there's a lot of inventions

you could reductively boil down that way. Oh, two-plied toilet paper, that's just two bits

of toilet paper stuck back to back. That's what I sociallyly said. Apparently, people like do this all the time.

They invite him on because they've heard about two-ply bacon. And if they're like me, I love a bit of

bacon. I get very excited about bacon and bacon-based lifestyles. So I was like, two-ply bacon, like

toilet paper, but for bacon at last. And he went, yeah, two-ply is for bacon at last. And then I tried some and realised that, yeah, yeah, like nice and crispy on the outside, soft and salty on the inside. That's the problem. You see, the two-ply toilet paper, I get your point that people can sniff at that and certainly don't after you've used it.

But my issue with two-plight tissue was the same at first, where I'm like, mate, there's two sides of this tissue paper not to getting used, which is why I peel them apart.

And then, I mean, by that point, it's so thin that I'm basically just wiping me ass with my fingers.

But then I've got two clean sheets of tissue paper to wipe them with.

And then don't bother washing your hands.

You've already used the toilet paper.

You're good to get on with the day.

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