Our time to put your middle to the test now.

Hey, hey, hey, don't you know you're messing with the best now?

Ah-huh, ah-hoo. Our fire in the whole collection allows you to smell like you've been showering in campfire,

gunpowder and whiskey without all those pesky and decent exposure charges and third degree burns.

There's a soap that makes you smell like gunpowder, campfire and whiskey.

You can smell like my actual dad.

I saw you share this earlier, and I keep thinking about the specific wording,

because they say about, like, you can smell like these things

without the indecent exposure charges and the burns.

Are they suggesting that previously the only way to smell like this was to fuck a bonfire?

Yes. I think that's what it is.

Yeah. You would have indecently exposed yourself and really burn those genitals.

That was previously the only way.

Get your kit off and squat up and down on it.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, just do a full Targaryen. Do you remember that, kids? So this is Outlaw Sopes.

Just some of the weird shit that just happens to annoy me on Facebook.

I mean, it says read about it and be overjoyed.

Like, is there a market for people who think to themselves,

I don't want to drink, but I want to smell like I've been drinking?

But who wants that?

It's the time of year where my inbox has just been full of, like,

everyone's got a holiday gift guide, and whether it's video games

...