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The Art of Charm

Playing It Safe Holds You Back | Elizabeth Weingarten

The Art of Charm

http://www.TheArtOfCharm.com

Education, Business, Health & Fitness

4.711K Ratings

🗓️ 25 August 2025

⏱️ 50 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What if the very questions keeping you up at night were the key to moving forward? In this episode, AJ and Johnny sit down with author Elizabeth Weingarten to challenge the tired advice to “embrace uncertainty” and show how reframing it as an invitation—not a problem—unlocks growth in career, relationships, and life. Drawing from her book How to Fall in Love with Questions, she shares how patience, courage, curiosity, and community help us stop chasing premature answers and instead thrive in the unknown, offering a practical framework to create meaning even when the future is unclear. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why “embrace uncertainty” is tone-deaf advice [00:02:15] Defining uncertainty: doubt that delays progress [00:05:07] Elizabeth’s personal crossroads: marriage doubts and a failing project [00:07:02] Rilke’s Letters to a Young Poet and the idea of “living the questions” [00:10:22] The human craving for certainty—and how it misleads us [00:16:02] Patience as a creative and relational superpower [00:20:05] Why patience without courage keeps us stuck [00:26:14] Building a “questions practice” to reframe binary thinking [00:33:19] Barbara’s story: identity shift after paralysis as freedom, not loss [00:40:03] Loving the questions as an act of self-compassion [00:44:13] First step: ask if your question narrows you—or opens possibility A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠theartofcharm.com/sc⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠CIA-proven guide⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/charm⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠shopify.com/charm⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Indeed.com/charm⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mintmobile.com/charm⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to ⁠JERRY.com/charm ⁠ Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.rula.com/charm ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠theartofcharm.com/influence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Episode resources: Elizabeth's Website How to Fall in Love with Questions Letters to a Young Poet Check in with AJ and Johnny! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AJ on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Johnny on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AJ on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Johnny on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Art of Charm on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Art of Charm on YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

You know, some people think OCD is just about keeping your house super clean?

0:04.0

That stereotype drives me crazy.

0:06.1

Real OCD creates these unwanted intrusive thoughts about stuff you actually care about,

0:11.3

like your social life.

0:12.4

Exactly.

0:13.4

It makes you doubt whether people actually like you or you're terrified.

0:16.4

You accidentally offended someone.

0:18.2

You spend hours replaying conversations looking for proof you're not a

0:22.1

terrible person. And those thoughts get so overwhelming. You start doing all these behaviors to make

0:26.8

them stop, like mentally reviewing every interaction or trying to cancel negative thoughts with

0:31.4

positive ones before you see friends. But here's the thing. The doubts and fears just come back

0:36.7

even stronger. It isolates you from the

0:38.9

connections that make life worth living. That's where NOCD comes in. They're the world's leading

0:43.9

provider of OCD treatment and all of their therapists specialize in ERP therapy. That's exposure

0:49.7

and response prevention. Not regular talk therapy, which actually makes OCD worse. NOCD does live

0:56.8

face-to-face virtual sessions, where they teach you proven techniques to manage intrusive thoughts

1:01.7

and reclaim your confidence. It's 100% virtual, covered by insurance for over 155 million Americans,

1:08.3

and you get support between sessions so you're not facing this alone.

1:12.9

If you think OCD might be holding you back, go to NOCD.com and book a free 15-minute call.

1:19.8

That's N-O-C-D.com.

1:22.3

If you're speeding through your life, if you're just trying to get to the next thing, you're

1:26.6

completely filtering out what's around you, you're just trying to get to the next thing, you're completely filtering

...

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