Good evening. I'm Piers Morgan, uncensored.

First tonight, breaking news, sensationalist,

photographs of Boris Johnson, having what appears to be an illicit party in Downing Street,

which seems to prove that he lied to the British people and to Parliament.

Also tonight, should Prince Andrew

weasel his way back into the Royal Spotlight?

Should wolf whistling be a criminal offence?

Plus the man, plus the man who ate a Big Mac every day for 50 years.

Spoiler alert, it wasn't me, though I wouldn't have minded if it was.

But first, it's my brain down.

Well, I was planning to start tonight's show

with the impending report

on illegal lockdown busting parties in Downing Street,

which is finally due any day now.

Feels like we waited longer

for civil servant Sue Gray's report

than the sequel to Top Gun.

But now it's here.

It looks like it could be every bit as explosive.

But in the last few hours, sensational photographs have been published by ITV News,

which in my view render the report, well, frankly, superfluous.

It's now pretty clear that Boris Johnson hasn't just lied to the British people in the media.

...