I'm Miranda Sawyer and I'm hosting the brand new podcast, Papercuts.

From the mail's obsession with woke, to the daily stars wore on pigeons,

to all the things the Guardian is telling you not to enjoy,

Papercuts digs into the private mania of the UK press.

And what that tells us about Britain today.

I'm joined by some of the UK's sharpest commentators and funniest comedians

to pick out the most eye-popping stories the morning press has to offer

and serve them up for your incredulity and entertainment.

Papercuts, we read the papers so you don't have to.

Out now, wherever you get your podcasts or visit papercutsshow.com.

Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the Orlando improv.

At the time we ask that you note the two emergency exits at the front

and rear of the showroom.

In case of an emergency, please proceed to these locations.

Please turn all phones to all four vibrate positions.

Talk and heckling are not tolerated any time during the show.

This is the Pete and Sebastian show with Pete Courtele

and Sebastian Menace Skelko.

T-Day.

Biscuit.

Orlando.

It's Jimmy from Boston.

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