Today's show debuts on December 7th, 2018, a day that will live in infamy, as the day we chose

this garbage scowl of a film to mark the 77th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor.

I am truly sorry.

This maybe was my idea, and it would constitute audience abuse if only state and federal law

had caught up to the fast-paced hazards of modern life.

Since at the time of this airing, audience abuse is not prosecutable,

I can only stand by this decision with both middle fingers raised.

History will not be kind to me, I'm sure.

It is also well beneath my dignity to walk anyone through the day the Germans bombed

Pearl Harbor, but suffice to say this movie sets itself within the context of Melrose Place, and is an offense to the senses.

It is no spoiler alert to say that not even Adam could find much to redeem it.

Although, now that I think about it it he does have a Ben Affleck throw pillow on the fold-out couch in the basement his wife refers to as Adam's bed, so maybe he was quietly seething. Who knows? Who cares? I'm going to take this time

instead to give you some behind the scenes glimpses of the whole friendly fire operation

as a Hanukkah present, mostly because Hanukkah does not require children to be good to receive gifts.

Did you know, I introduced Adam and Ben? I met Adam when he was 19 or 20, and he would come to Long Winter's concerts and ask me to sign his report card.

After a few years, when he'd brought me enough gifts that I bothered to learn his name, he started making a documentary about the Long Winters, and I talked to him adoringly about

myself for hours.

I remember him saying, John, stop saying I'm 19 or 20, I'm 29 years old, I'm a grown man. He really was adorable. I met Ben a few years later in New York and he couldn't have been a day older than 14. If I remember correctly he was wearing tennis whites and a straw boater, which was weird

enough even before you add in that he was working as a PA on a film, where all the other crew

members were in black Carhart's.

I think maybe he brought me some coffee and he tried to show me his screenplay.

I always mix him up with the other PA from that same period who wore a bowler hat and carried a shoe shine box.

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