So, you beautiful bastards. You're watching the Philip DeFranco show, and we got a lot of news to talk about today.

Starting with, let's talk about our douchebags of the day. And specifically, from my fellow

parents out there, if you ever feel like, oh, man, I'm a bad parent, at the very least, I just want you to remember, you're not one of these two.

Hopefully, I mean, I don't know you, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say, I think you are. Because the story begins with an anonymous call to 911, which got Florida sheriff's deputies to approach this couple on Daytona Beach. And their names are Alicia Langley

and Timothy Stevens. Also, if you are wondering why his face is so bruised, we'll get there. But anyway,

these two, they're engaged and they came from Georgia for a relaxing getaway. They also brought

along their kids who were five and seven years old. As well, as enough beer, whiskey, and other alcohol to get themselves so fucking sloshed out of their minds that they just passed out right there.

Completely oblivious to the fact that their kids just wandered off on their own to fucking who knows where.

When the cops showed up, they reportedly had to try eight times to wake them up before those heavy-ass eyelids finally cracked open.

Time to wake up, Liz.

Hey.

Come on.

The sheriff's office, wake up, Wes. Hey. Come on. The sheriff's office, wake up.

But then one of the deputies asking, hey, where are your kids?

Which Stevens just gestures generally towards the ocean as he stumbled in the sand.

Though I will say, thankfully, officers later found the kids unsupervised but safe at the hotel pool.

So the cops, they end up arresting both of these idiots for felony child neglect.

You know, they put Langley in the hotel pool. So the cops, they end up arresting both of these idiots for felony child neglect. You know, they put Langley in the cop car.

But then Stevens gets the bride idea, or his body just started moving.

He just all of a sudden turns and bolts.

You know what?

He made it several whole feet before he just face planted, knocking himself out.

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