Mayplay was, it was just a dream.

Growing up, he's a family, 24 brother and sister, one breast chicken was for three days. Growing up in the street, you need to survive.

Now when I have those images in my head, I could hear him trying to touch me and touching himself in the same time next to the bed, you know.

I was even attaching my pajama with my shoelaces

because to make sure like he can't put it down and one day he did and I was just like terrorized. So that's the things I grew up with like you know I

can't cry for me crying was a sign of weakness. When I do a video and I see a comment someone say,

or Patrice, my dad passed away, I watch one of your video and I smile. Thank you.

This is more important for me than win the championship or the Premier League.

I'm not perfect and I don't want to be perfect, I want to be me. Patrice Everra. I've just sat here with him for an hour and a half and at the very end of the conversation he said something which I think is the perfect description of the man.

He referred to himself as an iceberg. I followed him for almost two decades and he was to me this football icon this tough guy

this defender this champion but as he says in this conversation the part of the iceberg that I never got to see

was the most compelling, was the most heartbreaking, and was the most interesting.

He grew up in a rough part of France with 24 brothers and sisters.

He was sexually abused by his head teacher.

His brother, a drug addict, overdosed and died.

His mother raised him in total poverty to the point where he stole his food, his shoes, and his entertainment. He endured an early upbringing that you would

never wish on any child an enemy or anyone at all in any circumstances ever.

And he hit it all.

He hit it all for his entire life.

And only recently has he found it within himself after very personal conversations with his mother to share it with the world.

And only today on this podcast has he decided to share some of those heartbreaking

details. After watching him on TV for almost two decades, I thought I knew Patrice Ever, this

...