Are you a professional politician with anxiety from your recently committed crimes?

You deserve to feel your best.

You deserve destination cope.

The first ever mental health clinic and retreat designed exclusively for crony politicians.

If you're a high-ranking elected official and you're losing sleep over a regrettable

decision you recently made, we can make you feel guilt-free with our new and improved

treatment plans.

Make the John Fetterman special.

That's where you just got elected to a position you're obviously not qualified for,

so you take off a few months until everyone you're depressed.

Or the Lena Hidalgo special.

It's basically the same exact thing, but for people who identify as women, so what are

you waiting for?

Call destination cope today, because at destination cope, we never judge you for your little mistakes.

As long as you're checked clear.

Make your head, and I'll have a trial to make.

Make your head, and I'll have a trial to make.

All right.

All right.