So Rebecca I have some questions from patrons for you to answer, what do you say Rebecca?

Let's do it.

This is the Psychology and Seattle Podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Kirk Honda, I'm a therapist and I'm also a professor who are you Rebecca I'm Rebecca

I'm Rebecca bloom and I once was a professor but now I'm just a therapist right that's how we met We were the two young people by at least 20 years at the

university at the age of 40. We were the young people who understood computers

better than anyone else.

And we like the same music.

Yeah, Rebecca, here's a question about parenting.

Anonymous patron, she writes,

when my friend's husband is critical

toward their 12-year-old kid

and the kid's feelings are visibly hurt.

My friend reacts by going mama bear protective

and either criticizing her husband

or defending their child.

I've read that undermining your partner in front of your kids is not a good idea.

So what can she do in this dynamic to comfort her child without scolding or putting down her husband.

What she's doing now just results in her husband being more mad and doesn't,

it doesn't create any safety for the child.

In post-chat, he states she's too soft.

In post-chat?

He states she's too soft.

...