4.9 • 3.4K Ratings
🗓️ 3 April 2023
⏱️ 87 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
“I held it in this whole episode but then I went balls to the wall,” says Christi of the explosive fight that ends the latest episode of Dance Moms. This week’s competition takes place in Philadelphia, where the girls dance a ballet routine despite not having had a ballet class in three years. Chloe remembers this as the hardest dance she’s ever had to do. Christi remembers that they had a really nice steak dinner at Palm. Brooke has an acro solo called “The Diary of Anne Frank,” and Kelly says she’s pretty sure Anne Frank wasn’t doing cartwheels.
Since Paige has broken her foot, Abby puts Kendall into the group dance even though she is not part of the team. The other Moms are mad because their girls have given up so much of their time and energy not just to dance but to the show. The Moms joke that everywhere Jill goes one of the dancers mysteriously breaks a foot, first Taylor and now Paige. Meanwhile, Brooke’s back has gotten so sore it hurts for her to breathe, and Kelly finally pulls Brooke’s solo. Ever the opportunist, Jill asks if Kendall can take Brooke’s place.
Christi shares the story behind Abby calling Chloe a sneak and her a whore who sells t-shirts in a bar. The truth is, as usual, much different from Abby’s twisted narrative and production’s deceptive editing.
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0:00.0 | Baby, let's just dance dance, let's just dance. Baby, I just wanna dance dance dance dance dance dance dance dance. |
0:07.3 | Can you feel it? Can you take it? Can you come and breathe it? |
0:11.7 | All of it, electricity. Do we ride now? |
0:15.8 | Bye bye bye now. Turn up on your mark. Give me a electricity. |
0:21.2 | Hello, Bichettes. Welcome back to the bar. This is your fearless leader, bitch number one, Kristi. |
0:27.5 | And bitch number two, Kelly. Hi there. |
0:32.0 | Kelly and I were just bitching about how much we don't feel like recording because we're lazy pieces of shit. Hello. |
0:38.1 | I'm hungover. |
0:44.1 | Well, there's a lot in Steve for you. I know. Well, see, we always film on Friday morning and Thursday night. I like to go out. |
0:55.0 | And would you tell me this morning you go, I always visit my favorite bartenders on Thursday night. It's like Kelly. |
1:02.0 | I did bartenders. I do. |
1:07.0 | Are they the ones who made you that gross drink? Yeah, and I got a new drink today from them. They made me, they made me one last night. Yeah. |
1:13.0 | Oh, well, what is it? Mine's so boring. What do you see? You're gonna be like, you get an F for effort. Well, I failed them. |
1:22.0 | They made me a pair sage martini. That sounds look at the color of that. |
1:29.0 | But they gave me a piece two pieces of sage to put in it for my garnish. I specifically asked. They said, Oh, can I have sage for my garnish. |
1:38.0 | And they set it on top of my to go cup and drunken me. Yeah, of course. I didn't even have to tell me I knew drunken Kelly lost it. Please. |
1:49.0 | So I have no garnish. Well, I like the color of that. My glasses didn't. |
1:55.0 | But it does have a little tiniest to it. Yeah, it's pretty. Oh, God, wait. I am like bottom of the barrel. I couldn't be more. |
2:08.0 | Well, I don't want to say trash because I hate that. But I, I couldn't be. So I'm recording in my house today, like my house to New Orleans, my hotel's out. |
2:17.0 | And I was struggling this morning to get all my luggage moved from one to the other. And I have one bottle of booze in New Orleans and it's vodka. And I'm like, what am I going to mix this with? |
2:30.0 | I had McDonald's orange juice. |
2:33.0 | Oh, my God. What a loser. I'm like my screwdriver. But then I thought to myself, do you know how many times I drank from McDonald's cup sitting upstairs? |
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